The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let's Do the Time Warp Again

"The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let's Do the Time Warp Again" (2016, Kenny Ortega, Fox 21 Television Studios, Ode Sound & Visuals, The Jackal Group) is the tribute to Richard O'Brien's 1975 cult masterpiece homage to sci-fi cinema, The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

The bulk of the movie is a scene for scene remake of the original but there's additional wrap-around scenes involving a cinema full of Rocky Horror movie-goers and we get some screen time from The Usherette (Ivy Levan) who was present only in the stage production of the original and not present in the 1975 film. She's a good addition, looking pretty awesome in her kick ass outfit, and keeping the rabble of cinema goers in check... Kind of. The wrap-around plot also brings in some of the traditional audience participation aspects which surround live viewings and stage productions of the cult classic.

We follow Brad Majors (Ryan McCartan) and his new fiancé, Janet Weiss (Victoria Justice), on a road trip which leads them to the castle of Dr. Frank-N-Furter (Laverne Cox) when their car breaks down. Upon admission to the castle by the handyman, Riff Raff (Reeve Carney), they discover that the inhabitants of this home are not normal. From Magenta the maid (Christina Milian) to Columbia the groupie (Annaleigh Ashford), everyone is a touch insane and Frank is not keen to let the couple leave. But when they do leave, will they ever feel the same?

As well as the audience wrap-around, which I appreciated, the film does have some good points. Victoria Justice's rendition of Janet is very close to Susan Sarandon's original film version. Her singing style is absolutely pitch perfect. Reeve Carney's rendition of Riff Raff is also very similar to Richard O'Brien's vision - except for that wig! Adam Lambert also does a really good job of playing Eddie, and although his part is short, it was a good few scenes. Ben Vereen also updates the character of Dr. Everett von Scott.

Our title character, Rocky (Staz Nair), looks amazing in his little gold boxers, and Laverne Cox gives an excellent portrayal of Frank-N-Furter with a sexual flare that is both very different to Tim Curry's iconic rendition and also similar in its power. My only main bicker with this character is that I feel that not having stockings and suspenders on kind of takes away from Frank's style.

Having Tim Curry himself play the narrator was also very moving.

Now to the flaws; Mr. Director, Ortega, is from High School Musical fame and you can tell. This feels like a shiny penny of a production and it kind of robs some of the soul away that the original and the stage productions enjoy. It's overly produced and the costumes look like costumes, not what the characters happen to be wearing. Magenta's outfit in particular looked way too pristine. However, I liked her hair!

Having all the songs the same is, of course, a must for Rocky. It's all about the music! But I feel like updating the story to modern day might have been a good twist making this remake seem a little more worthwhile.

All in all, it's not a terrible movie, but it feels like a shiny TV homage more than an update of the classic. I doubt there will be many die hard fans of this version in years to come and it might slink into obscurity.

[Image: Fox Television Studios, et al]

Hani

 

Gingerclown

"Gingerclown" (2013, Balázs Hatvani) is a horror comedy set in 1983.

I add "comedy" in loosest possible way....

A group of unconvincing high school bullies dare Sam (Ashley Lloyd) to go into an abandoned amusement park. One of the bullies' disgruntled girlfriends, Jenny (Erin Hayes), who seems to be growing a conscience, goes in after him, spurring the bullies to follow suit.

Unfortunately, the park is now home to a pack of monstrous creatures who, as well as hating each other, also enjoy torturing and killing hapless humans.

An absolute 'WTF' from the get go. From the forced "bad movie" dialogue from our 'teens' to the foul-mouthed rubber creatures, this film is just not what I expected.

It's like someone said "you know, Tim Curry was terrifying as IT and Brad Dourif really was fantastic as that sweary little dolly... I wonder if they'd voice a scary clown and a gross alien creature for us?" and somehow convinced them, and Lance Henriksen from Aliens, to join the cast! Albeit with voiceovers probably recorded elsewhere...

But that's as far as the creativity went...

From start to end, this film smacked of wanting to make a 'so bad it's good' film, without actually being able to pull it off. The result? So bad it's... well, bad!

The purposefully stilted delivery of all of the lines gives the film an odd feeling. Rather than being 'in the style of the 1980s' it comes across more of someone doing a really bad impression of an 80s film...

The styling of the creatures is fun. From evil tea kettles to head-punting spider monsters, but each scene is the same. It's like walking through a ghost ride with a camera then playing it back to find that you really had to be there to enjoy it.

1) Sam stumbles into new scene
2) Jenny follows
3) awkward conversation about how all the others are dicks/escaping
4) cue monster
5) monster swears a lot and says some crazy stuff (eg. a crap riddle)
6) monster attacks
7) Sam and Jenny escape and move onto next scene
8) Repeat steps 1 - 7

Ginger Clown himself (Tim Curry) doesn't look much like a clown, and doesn't really sound like Tim Curry... Which surely defeats the purpose?

It's very formulaic and I wouldn't sit through it again, but I must commend Mr Hatvani on getting a horror-star studded voiceover cast into his movie, even if the end product is just a horror channel worthy effort.

Hani

Tales From the Crypt: Ritual

"Tales From the Crypt: Ritual" (2002, Avi Nesher, RKO Pictures, Silver Pictures, Dimension Films) is actually the third full length film based on the fondly remembered series, “Tales From the Crypt”. Sadly, due to some executive decisions relating to popularity of these films (or lack thereof), there is no sign or mention of the Crypt Keeper himself.

We meet Dr. Alice Dodgson (Jennifer Grey) who has had her medical licence revoked for using medication which has not been approved by the medical board and killing a patient. She had some noble reasons though, so we’re supposed to forgive her malpractice without question...

Anyway, long story short she secures herself a position in Jamaica treating one patient, rich boy Wesley Claybourne (Daniel Lapaine), who believes he is under a Voodoo curse.

She makes friends with a feisty young woman with loose morals, Caro (Kristen Wilson, and makes friendly acquaintances with resident vet and filthy older man, Matthew (Tim Curry) and driver J.B. (Gabriel Casseus).

More of a mystery film than a horror, I’d hasten to add that the only action is all in our characters’ heads in the form of hallucination and even then the plot and action are slow until the end when a delightful “Crypt” twist is added. All that was missing was The Keepers gleeful laughter there.

The redeeming qualities are, of course, the presence of Tim Curry, who is grossly underutilised in the script, and Dirty Dancing’s Jennifer Grey,  as well as harking back to the voodoo zombie classics of old (“I Walked With a Zombie” and “White Zombie” for example), however, the execution is not up to scratch resulting in a shoddy knock-off rather than a clever homage.

Not one I’d willingly sit through again.

[Image: Dimension Films]

 

Hani

IT

"IT" (1990, Lorimar Productions, DawnField Entertainment, Warner Bros. Television, Tommy Lee Wallace) is one of the classic Stephen King adaptations. It's one of the few King books turned films that have actually been done well! If not completely accurately, but when has that ever happened? This is the made for TV version, which is the superior version in my book.

The fabulous Tim Curry (Dr. Frank-N-Furter himself!) stars as the child-eating-fear-demon (well really, he's more of an interdimensional-being, but whatever!), who often takes the form of Pennywise the 'dancing' (read 'insane') clown. Pennywise plays with his victims, either luring them to their death like a Kelpie, or by simply scaring them to death by transforming into their worst fear. We see him lure a small girl to her death at the start of the film.

When Mike (Tim Reid, who is the dad from 'Sister, Sister') is at the scene of the crime, he spots an old photo lying on the grass. The photo is of a small boy, who he recognises as the deceased younger brother of one of his old school friends, Bill. Bill's baby brother, Georgie (Tony Dakota) was one of Pennywise's victims in the 60s, when Mike and his pals were all children. It was Georgie's death which started the group's adventurous involvement with crazy clown man.

Mike calls up all his old friends, who have since moved away from the small Maine town of Derry, and have forgotten most of their childhoods and all about Pennywise, thanks to the creature's magical defences. The gang make their way back to Derry at the pleading of Mike, and slowly begin to remember what had happened there.

The film is really following one storyline, the group vanquishing 'IT'. But the film shows two stories, the group battling IT as children, and then again as adults when the creature rises again.

As children, the group were: African-American Mike (Marlon Taylor) who is facing the still very racist bullies at school, talented writer Bill (Jonathan Brandis) who blames himself for the death of his young brother at the hands of the demented Clown, lone girl in the group Beverly (Emily Perkins) who has an abusive father, funny guy Richie (a young, but remarkably completely recognisable Seth Green), hypochondriac asthmatic Eddie (Adam Faraizl), competent and intelligent Ben (Brandon Crane) who is bullied for being fat, but by today's standards, he's pretty normal and Stan (Ben Heller), who is introduced as a Jewish boyscout and a birdwatcher.

As adults, the group are: still-in-Derry, Mike (Tim Reid), horror writer (who's totally based on Stephen King himself) Bill (Richard Thomas), fashion designer in an abusive relationship, Beverly (Annette O'Toole), TV comedian Richie (Harry Anderson), virgin limo business owner Eddie (Dennis Christopher), famous, and no longer fat, architect Ben (John Ritter) and real estate broker Stan (Richard Masur).

The film is quite long at 195minutes, and the DVD is one of those ones where you have to flip it over half way through to see the rest of the film. This is because the film was shown as a two parter on TV.

Despite the length, the film isn't boring and the special effects are excellent. There's a lot of blood, but it's not gory, usually coming from sinks, balloons and other odd places. The film and characters are very 80s. Since it came out in 1990, this isn't a criticism. Most of the characters, except the main characters, are unlikable and cruel. But this is on purpose, to build up group dynamic and emphasize the group's status as losers.

Pennywise is the epitome of creepy and really a complete and utter nightmare monster. A real modern classic in that respect. Tim Curry is one of the masters at creating demented characters, and really brings the fear guzzling creature to life, probably fuelling quite a few people's fear of clowns over the years, too!

The dialogue isn't always the smartest, but that isn't the most important part of the film. And the end left me a little non-plussed. The undertheme, as common to King books, is about being the oddball, beating the odds and bullying (whether it be by greaser teens, or by monsters).

A classic and an excellent film all round, I recommend "IT" as a must see!

[Picture: Lorimar Productions, DawnField Entertainment, Warner Bros. Television]

Hani