Humanoids from the Deep

"Humanoids from the Deep" aka "Monster" (1980, Barbara Peeters, New World Pictures, Roger Corman) is a slice of schlocky good-Mc-badness. A low budget 80s sea misadventure which is just a bit of cheesy fun!

The small seaside town of Noyo, USA is terrorised by humanoid fish creatures with a thirst for blood and a lust for human women.

Gloop, nude ladies, blatantly obvious jump scares, rubber monster suits, wooden acting, a plot so thin you can see through it & 80s clothing galore: what more can you ask?

A wannabe drive-through film that harks back to the old 1950s creature features, "Humanoids from the Deep" is a thoroughly 80s attempt. And that's what makes it so damn entertaining!

It's hardly a nail biter, and winds up being more funny than scary with its splattering blood and 'monster noises'.

Not one for the dog lovers, though, with a high canine death count. Be warned!

Things of note:

One of the tunes played by the band at the festival sounds a lot like 'head, shoulders, knees and toes'...

A guy with a ventriloquist dummy as part of his chat-up line actually almost gets laid! 

The monsters also seem to love boobs. Well, what self respecting salmon-monster doesn't?And the film's quota of naked ladies was certainly used to the full extent!

Something for when you're in a not-too-serious mood and you want to watch some slippery villains try to kill a bunch of fishermen and get as many blonde chicks naked as possible, with an ending that will make you snort cola out of your nose (or red wine in my case!).

[Image: New World Pictures]

Hani

The Bay

"The Bay" (2012, Barry Levinson) is a found footage 'mock-umentary' about the ecological side-effects the human race is having on the globe, and is pretty much a nature-bites-back-film.

Based in a small American Seaside town called Chesapeake during their 4th of July celebrations, we watch through the confiscated found footage of the inhabitants and a small student news blog as the town falls into chaos when a terrifying menace begins threatening the lives of the townspeople.

I'm not usually fan of found-footage, but I'm happy to report that "The Bay" is a winner for me. It was gross, scary and had a plot. While it's evidently a platform for Levinson to preach a little about global pollution and governmental transparency, it does so with style and excellent effects.

Some good old jump scares keep the pace, while we also get a lot of disturbing visuals and an engaging and almost 'mystery'-like slow reveal of the true cause of the panic and deaths.

While it's certainly no "Jaws", it's a really good yarn. Hey, and Kirsten Connolly from "Cabin In The Woods" is in it!

Hani