Final Destination 5

"Final Destination 5" (2011, Steven Quale, New Line Cinema, Practical Pictures, Zide/Perry Productions) is the fifth entry in the Final Destination franchise.

Sam (Nicholas D'Agosto) experiences a detailed vision while setting off with his colleagues on a bus trip. The vision shows the North Bay Bridge suddenly collapsing while they are on it, killing everyone except for his ex-girlfriend, Molly (Emma Bell). Sam manages to convince a few people to leave with him and they get to witness the bridge collapse from a safe distance. But, like always, death has designs on their lives and will stop at almost nothing to claim his due.

Much like its predecessors, the film's main point of interest is the complex Rube Goldberg Machine-esque deaths of each of the characters. The characters are rounded enough to make their deaths worth watching, but they remain mainly cannon fodder for death. Some of the effects suffer from feeling a little too computer generated, but there are certainly enough gruesome ideas to make you squirm. A short scene from the legendary Tony Todd is also always appreciated.

The action is entertaining enough to keep viewers engaged. It is one of the stronger entries in the franchise overall and feels fairly satisfying in where it decides to go throughout the plot.

[Image: New Line Cinema, et al]

Hani

Splatter

"Splatter" (2009, Joe Dante, Roger Corman, Netflix) is a short web series from the earlier days of the concept of TV streaming.

Johnny Splatter (Corey Feldman) was a troubled rock star who filmed himself graphically committing suicide. A small group of family, friends and colleagues are invited to his home for a will reading. Each, suspecting that they're about to be handed a massive payout, turn up, despite revealing that they didn't exactly like Johnny much.

Suddenly, the TV springs to life, revealing that Splatter filmed his will prior to his untimely demise... Or, is he back to take vengeance on his unappreciative acquaintances? As the episodes progressed, viewers were asked to vote for who would meet their death next.

The series suffers from its overtly corny style that comes across as a little too sincere, but overall I found the layout, practical effects and over the top characters to be tongue-in-cheek and a bit of fun.  There were, apparently, more episodes but only the initial run of three are available to view easily on Netflix. It is undeniably a disappointing effort from Dante and Corman, but this is likely down to the confines of the schedule and the gimmick.

Horror films have a great and long history of using gimmicks, and this early example of a Netflix original is no different. Feldman's vengeful zombie delivers a demanding "Who's next?" at the end of every episode and, at the time, the audience were given the chance to vote. It's cheesy, but that's what I was there for. I've also just always liked Corey Feldman.

We have the usual tropes and a small cast of characters including the ever awesome Tony Todd bringing us the only seemingly sane character in the bunch. While the short series is hammy and manages not to be particularly innovative, despite its natty gimmick, it delivers its resolution quickly and was certainly part of Netflix's foray into changing viewer's habits and a step towards the innovation and horror series being created today.

[Image: Netflix]

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Wishmaster

"Wishmaster" (1997, Robert Kurtzman, Wes Craven, Live Entertainment) is a movie about a djinn (genie) who grants wishes in return for your soul, only, like all genie tales, the wishes never turn out how you imagined them.

We are first introduced to this djinn (Andrew Divoff) creature in 1127 Iran where a Persian emperor has set it free and it is causing all kinds of massacre on his people. This is where we are told the rule: the one who sets a djinn free is granted 3 wishes, but their third wish will free the djinn and all his friends to destroy the earth.

Snap to modern day and the art collector, Beaumont (Robert Englund) is having an ancient statue delivered to his collection. Only, the crane operator is drunk and accidentally drops the statue, killing Beaumont's assistant and releasing the red ruby containing the djinn. The gem is pawned by one of the workers and eventually comes into the hands of Alex (Tammy Lauren) who accidentally awakens the djinn. The djinn goes off on its merry way, torturing any whom it can trick into saying 'I wish' and claiming their souls, which, through her links to the djinn as its 'master', Alex can see as visions. The creature eventually takes the form of a deceased man and goes around town by the name Nathaniel Demerest.

Eventually, Alex and the djinn confront each other. Can Alex trick the djinn, as he has tricked people for centuries, with her final wish?

A cheesy 90s gore movie with a hell of a lot of genre-cameos (Robert Englund, Kane Hodder, Tony Todd, Ted Raimi, Ricco Ross... to name a few). The action is funny and over the top, the acting is sometimes dubious but suits the film, the plot is a little thin (probably hence all the gore) and it is far from actually scary, but I enjoy "Wishmaster". Kurtzman was a makeup and effects artist, so he was keen to make use of as many practical effects as he could which I appreciate, even if some did not date very well. All in all, this is very much a friends and pizza kind of cheesy movie rather than a smart nail biter. If you're looking for chills, tension or intelligent writing, this is probably not the film for you.

[Image: Live Entertainment]

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Shadow Puppets

"Shadow Puppets" (2007, Shoreline Entertainment, Angel Entertainment, Michael Winnick) is a haunted insane asylum flick.

A woman (Jolene Blalock) awakes alone in a padded cell with no memory of who she is, wearing only a vest top and shorts. She eventually becomes aware of a man (James Marsters) in another cell. He too cannot remember who he is and is also wearing a vest top and shorts.

They decide to trust one another and go on a tour of the apparently abandoned building. They find several other people, all in the same state of dress and with apparent amnesia. Some are locked up in slightly more worrying ways, and so the group let them out dubiously. Amongst the crowd are the ever awesome and combative Tony Todd, Marc Winnick, Natasha Alam, Diahnna Nicole Baxter, Richard Whiten and Jennie Ford.

During this, they are being hunted down, and some killed, by a living shadow. It appears to have heat vision and is hungry for people...

For a sense of roundness, despite all the characters having supposed  amnesia(!), you have the nerd, the vixen, the scary guy, the one who just dies first, the moan-y chick who's probably talking sense, the hero, the heroine... etc... etc....

As well as trying to find their way out of the asylum, avoid or vanquish the monster and find out who they are, they also attempt to solve the mystery of what has happened to them.

Will they escape? Can they trust one another? Will they like what they find out about themselves? Watch and see!

The special effects are computer generated and low budget. Some of the scene dialogue is a bit 'by the numbers' but Jolene Blalock shines as the lead character and the cast as a whole are really very well rounded. And when can you not love Tony Todd getting angry?

I'm a James Marsters fan. Any movie he is in I'll watch. Any movie he's in running around in a state of undress is really a bonus. It's nice to see him playing a role in his own accent and a human too! Although, as usual, he's not all he appears....

There's a twist which you may not see coming if you keep away from the internet. The characters are built up well to make each look suspicious, and the setting is spot on!

Not a huge fan of the end, and poor James gets the worst of the special effects for his big exit! Some shadow spokes through the nipples? Really?!

There is one really fun scene in the lab though, which they used in the trailer.

The start might make you jump if you're not expecting it. But all in all, it's not a very scary movie. But it has promise, and I wouldn't chuck it out of my collection, even if it's just so I can own things with Mr. Marsters in that don't involve bleached hair...

A good yarn.

[Picture: Shoreline Entertainment]

Hani