Body Bags

"Body Bags" (1993, John Carpenter, Tobe Hooper, 187 Corp., Showtime Networks) is a made for TV horror anthology set in a morgue. The film was initially meant to become a weekly show similar to "Tales from the Crypt" but was axed, and so the completed pieces were pieced together into an anthology.

A creepy coroner (John Carpenter) sets us up for each segment, inspired by the bodies he uncovers from the bags. There are three tales all-in:

The Gas Station
Anne (Alex Datcher) is a student starting her new part time job as the overnight petrol station attendant. As if that job is not just creepy enough, she has to deal with knowing that a dangerous lunatic has escaped the asylum (she was kindly warned by her new colleague, Bill (Robert Carradine)). Soon all of her customers appear to be a little strange and Anne is frantic, not knowing who could be the killer! Horror hero cameos include Wes Craven, Sam Raimi, David Naughton, George Buck Flower and Molly Cheek).

The short is a bit of a lark with so many horror favourites gracing the screen with their nutty characters and a fair bit of bludgeoning. While it's your typical 'lone woman being stalked by a serial killer' plot, it's fun in its familiarity and really kicks off the film.

Hair
Richard (Stacy Keach) is hitting middle age. His girlfriend, Megan (Sheena Easton), is getting exasperated by Richard's obsession with his looks and his quickly thinning locks. In his desperation, Richard signs up for a hair transplant operation which appears successful. Maybe a little too successful...

A bit of a laugh with some effects that aged a little, but add to the charm of the film. I thought I knew where this one was going but after a point it changes tack slightly which pleased me. Yes, it's hardly 'scary' but I don't watch old anthologies for scare factor, they're purely for comedy. Cameos include Debbie Harry and David Warner as the mad doctor and his nurse.

Eye
Brent Matthews (Mark Hamill) is a baseball player. He is involved in a car accident where his eye is gouged out. Brent opts for some experimental surgery that is not considered so sci-fi these days, and receives an eye transplant in the hopes that he can return to his beloved game. But, similarly to the later 2002 and 2008 Singaporean and American blockbusters both called "The Eye", he begins to see things that are not there through the new eye: horrible things. Brent becomes suspicious that his new eye belonged to a killer and goes back to the doctor to investigate. Brent realises that there is only one way to end this problem... Cameos include Twiggy and Roger Corman.

A few gruesome bits make this one entertaining but it was admittedly my least favourite short of the three. In retrospect this one seems very tropey, but it's not its fault; it came first afterall!

We end back in the morgue where our creepy coroner reveals he is more than at first appears.

The film comes off as surprisingly low budget, but this may just be a sign of ageing SFX. While it's nothing new in terms of plot or set up, it's a playful horror anthology and is funny, self aware and even a little gruesome at times. Team this one with Creepshow 1 and you're onto a bloody good night in!

[Image: 187 Corp.]

Hani

Wishmaster

"Wishmaster" (1997, Robert Kurtzman, Wes Craven, Live Entertainment) is a movie about a djinn (genie) who grants wishes in return for your soul, only, like all genie tales, the wishes never turn out how you imagined them.

We are first introduced to this djinn (Andrew Divoff) creature in 1127 Iran where a Persian emperor has set it free and it is causing all kinds of massacre on his people. This is where we are told the rule: the one who sets a djinn free is granted 3 wishes, but their third wish will free the djinn and all his friends to destroy the earth.

Snap to modern day and the art collector, Beaumont (Robert Englund) is having an ancient statue delivered to his collection. Only, the crane operator is drunk and accidentally drops the statue, killing Beaumont's assistant and releasing the red ruby containing the djinn. The gem is pawned by one of the workers and eventually comes into the hands of Alex (Tammy Lauren) who accidentally awakens the djinn. The djinn goes off on its merry way, torturing any whom it can trick into saying 'I wish' and claiming their souls, which, through her links to the djinn as its 'master', Alex can see as visions. The creature eventually takes the form of a deceased man and goes around town by the name Nathaniel Demerest.

Eventually, Alex and the djinn confront each other. Can Alex trick the djinn, as he has tricked people for centuries, with her final wish?

A cheesy 90s gore movie with a hell of a lot of genre-cameos (Robert Englund, Kane Hodder, Tony Todd, Ted Raimi, Ricco Ross... to name a few). The action is funny and over the top, the acting is sometimes dubious but suits the film, the plot is a little thin (probably hence all the gore) and it is far from actually scary, but I enjoy "Wishmaster". Kurtzman was a makeup and effects artist, so he was keen to make use of as many practical effects as he could which I appreciate, even if some did not date very well. All in all, this is very much a friends and pizza kind of cheesy movie rather than a smart nail biter. If you're looking for chills, tension or intelligent writing, this is probably not the film for you.

[Image: Live Entertainment]

Hani

Wes Craven's New Nightmare

"Wes Craven's New Nightmare" aka "New Nightmare" (1994, Wes Craven, New Line Cinema) is the 7th Freddy film in the series and is the finale by Wes Craven which aims to put Freddy to bed for good and reclaim the series after some truly abysmal sequels. Of course, we all know that "Freddy vs Jason" happened 9 years later, but that's a different story...

This film enjoys an invisible fourth wall and acts as a nice wink and a nudge to the fans as we follow, instead of Nancy from the first film, Heather Langenkamp (who played Nancy in the first film) as she begins to suffer Freddy nightmares.  This quickly escalates into a much darker story when it becomes apparent that Heather is not the only one.

To make matters worse, she's been asked to appear as Nancy again on Wes Craven's new Freddy film and is surprised on air by an appearance of Robert "Freddy" Englund during an interview.

With 'cameos' from Wes Craven and John Saxon as well as hefty screen time of Robert Englund in both his forms, this film brings the franchise back from the dead while also giving a satisfactory 'out'.

The effects are fun and fit in with the series perfectly and Freddy's stalking is actually more frightening again and less cartoony. There are also question-marks over Englund's disappearance mid-film which has the spooky connotations of him actually transforming into the nightmare man!

The explanation as to how Freddy can get into the real world is good and ties in well, separating this film from the mythos of the previous ones nicely.

More scary but not without the laughs we've come to expect from Mr. Krueger and a wholly fun film. Recommended!

[Image: New Line Cinema]

Hani

The Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors

"The Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors" (1987, Chuck Russell, New Line Cinema) is the return to form sequel with the worst name. Craven returned to take over the screenplay to this one, and you can tell. However, like most cult geniuses in the film and TV industry (see Joss Whedon), Craven's original and far superior plot, was stomped all over to make it more 'commercial'... Ah, Hollywood, where dreams are... whatever.

Realising that taking Freddy out of the dream 'verse was a major error, and a no-go with fans, they took him back to his original domain: the nightmare.

But, where in the first film he's killing kids in their sleep and in the second he's framing kids for murder, in this third film Freddy's turning his hand to framing kids for suicide. We also see the return of Nancy (Heather Langenkamp) from the first film... who I'd thought was dead, but once the film got rolling, I'm glad she wasn't.

Set in a psychiatric ward for young teens, Freddy (Robert Englund) is terrorising a group of kids whom have been sectioned for their strange sleeping (or lack thereof) behaviour - caused by Mr. Krueger, also.

Nancy enters as a 'dream expert' and we also have Dr. Neil Gordon (Craig Wasson) and  Dr. Simms (Priscilla Pointer), who are 'looking after' the group.

Also spot a young Laurence Fishburne, whom you may recognise as Morpheus from 'The Matrix'.

Realising that Krueger has returned, Nancy joins forces with the kids to defeat him, with initially sceptical help from Dr. Gordon.

A relatively engaging plot, with actors who can actually act and some very enjoyably 80s gore scenes (the 'puppet' suicide is a particular favourite of mine). There are also a lot of dream-related scenes. Some are good, especially the Freddy snake and the roast pig scenes, but some are just laughable - the wheelchair attack scene for example...

There are quite a few nods to the first film: the house comes up a lot for instance. But they decide to investigate Freddy's early life and his burial ground in order to end his reign. Sadly, it doesn't end here because this film isn't too bad, and is what most people feel to be the true sequel.

[Picture: New Line Cinema]

Hani

The Nightmare on Elm Street

"The Nightmare on Elm Street" (1984, Wes Craven, New Line Cinema) is the first and, in my opinion, best of the series of  the "Nightmare...." saga.. This film introduces us to famously unkillable and unavoidable, Freddy Krueger (Robert Englund). Freddy's the stuff of nightmares. Not only are they his domain, but they are also his hunting ground. And his favourite kind of victim is? Oh, teenage cannon fodder, of course!

As Halloween approaches, I like to lace my usual random horror viewing with some real classics, because frankly, I like to be scared and sometimes the classics are the only way to do that. So I'm starting with some base fears (via yesterday's 'IT' and today's Freddy); the nightmare.

When a group of friends all have similar nightmares about getting hunted down and murdered by a mysterious and severely disfigured man with a glove which has knives for fingers, you'd think they'd be a little worried. But you know horror movie teens; they love sex... And to hell with everything else!

When Tina (Amanda Wyss) is then murdered in her sleep by said man, the teens begin to realise that there is someone stalking them in their dreams... A someone who can kill you, and whom you can't avoid, because... well... Everyone sleeps.

Poor Nancy (Heather Langenkamp), Glen (a very young Johnny Depp in his first big screen film role) and Rod (Nick Corri) try to avoid ol' murderous Freddy as best they can, but can you just fathom it? None of the grown ups believe them! And instead think that they are all either crazy or mad killers!

The special effects are still admiral to this day (for instance the much copied bath scene), although often a little kitsch and corny (the mildly hilarious phone-tongue scene for example). The bit with the stairs was always my favourite, though! Really gave me the shivers as a kid.

The scary thing about Freddy is that he has utter control in the dream realm, and an uncanny knack of convincing you that you're actually awake and safe! The false-start dream sequence is overplayed these days, but "Nigtmare..." still brings it with the best of them.

Englund clearly relishes his role as psychotic child-murderer-turned-murderous-dream-ghost, bringing an edge of manic glee to the role. His iconic jumper, hat and glove is still a common sight on Halloween to this day on both males and females alike.

A real classic that suffers from the 'too-many-sequels-spoils-the-broth' mentality which threatens many of the greats (see 'Halloween', 'Friday the 13th', 'Poltergeist', 'Alien' and 'Predator' for evidence...) and not so greats (see 'Puppet Master'...). Craven is one of the few masters of the 'too-many-sequels' craft, however, and has enjoyed much success with his 'Scream' films.

The plot is actually pretty dark (as most horrors obviously are), and the adults in the film are way too busy trying to ignore their own dark secrets to admit that Freddy is killing again. This level can easily be ignored by the gorehounds looking for boobs and blood, but for those seeking something more, it can add another dimension.

A film everyone should see at least once, and one which manages to remain funny and jumpy despite it's rapidly ageing look.

[Picture: New Line Cinema]

Hani

The People Under the Stairs

"The People Under the Stairs" (1991, Wes Craven, Universal Pictures) is a fun little horror about a sick couple. It's also a comment on racism and child abuse. But don't let that put you off!

A young boy living in the ghetto, Poindexter aka 'Fool' (Brandon Adams), lovingly nicknamed by his older sister as whenever she reads his Tarot cards the Fool card always comes up, decides to get involved in a robbery in order to help his family. His mother is sick, his sister, Ruby, is a young mother and his family are about to be evicted from their home unfairly. The landlords, The Robesons, are Fool and his friend Leroy's (Ving Rhames) target.

The Robesons are a creepy, incestuous couple, who keep their daughter Alice (A.J. Langer) locked up in her room. Alice behaves herself as she is painfully aware of what will happen to her if she misbehaves.

As is predictable, Mr. and Mrs. Robeson (Everett McGill and Wendy Robie) hide behind 'faith' to tell themselves that the evil they commit is ok. The couple are portrayed amazingly by McGill and Robie; manic and crazy.

In the basement are the Robeson's old children. See, they like to snatch babies and then when the children get too old or begin to display 'misbehaviour', they cut off the offending part (wicked tongues, eavesdropping ears...) and then throw them into the cellar to live like animals. They also feed them intruders, visitors and door-to-door sales people. So far, all the kids in the basement are boys. Alice is the only girl.

One child, a smart and manic kid called Roach (Sean Whalen) has escaped the cellar and now lives in the walls of the house. Roach is awesome! He is constantly being hunted by Daddy Robeson (who likes to wear a gimp suit for hunting...) with a rifle. Roach is Alice's only friend.

Fool finds himself in trouble when he and Leroy find their partner in crime dead and then cannot escape the house before the Robesons return. Leroy, being a big man, doesn't last long as he can't sneak about like Fool can.

Fool manages to escape (with the loot!) but can't live knowing poor Alice and all those crazy mutilated kids are still in that house, and goes back in to save the day. Does he make it? Watch and see!

Adams gives an enjoyable performance as our young hero.

A nicely paced movie with lots of jumps. The kids in the cellar like to jump out at opportune moments. Prince the bloodthirsty dog is a nice addition, too. Although, if you don't want to see a fake dog get stabbed through a wall with a machete.... I'm just sayin'.

A nice cheesy happy ending manages not to ruin the film. The cellar kids manage to sneak out into the big bad world, but they neglect to grab any of the free money. Dolts! Plus, they all look like gollum with hair, surely someone spotted them?!

Another small issue I have with this flick is that all the kids look about the same age. Surely they didn't steal 15 - 20 babies at the same time?

But on the good side, some blood, angry puppies, knives, guns, crazy religious people, incest, cannibalism, robbery, good intentions and explosives; what's not to like?

Worth a look, don't expect to be scared though.

[Picture: Universal Pictures]

Hani 

Scream 4

"Scream 4" or "Scre4m" (2011, Wes Craven, Dimension Films) is the fourth installment in the Scream franchise.

I first saw this film in the cinema with a good buddy of mine called Steff. She and I used to be flatmates and our mutual love of horror (and also our other amazing flatmates) made my second year of University most enjoyable!

"Scream 4" laughs at itself; it's definitely a horror-comedy. Craven's magical talent to create films with successful and numerous sequels has struck again, albeit with one of the lowest-grossing films of the series. "Scream 4" knows it's daft and it's going to rub it in your face! And you're going to enjoy it.

Kind of merging the killings of the original "Scream" movie and the horror-movie-analysis style of all of the sequels, the film follows the life of Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell); one of the three survivors from the massacres, the other two being, now Sheriff, Dewey Riley (David Arquette) and ex-reporter-now-struggling-author, Gail Riley, née Weathers, (Courteney Cox).

Sidney has returned to Woodsboro for the final leg of her book tour with her publicist Rebecca Walters (Alison Brie). Naturally, Sidney's return sparks a bunch of murders by the new 'Ghostfaces', but is it someone she knows? You'd think she'd learn by now to just keep away from Woodsboro around the anniversary of the massacres!

There's a lot of references to the original 3 movies; Billy Loomis' name is brought up a lot, bulletproof vests, there's a Stab-a-thon party... It's all in jest, and it's a nice little in-joke with the audience.

Also, I do love a few false starts to a movie.

All in all, Emma Roberts (who plays Sidney's cousin Jill Roberts) gives a good unhinged performance.

Also plenty of gore!

There's a few cameos (Anna Pacquin from Tru Blood and X-Men, Kirsten Bell from Veronica Mars) and I enjoyed Hayden Panettiere's character, Kirby Reed; the popular chick who likes horror movies (me thinks this is a little bit of wishful thinking on the part of Kevin Williamson, the writer).

All in all a good laugh and an excellent tongue-in-cheek addition to the already tongue-in-cheek series that is "Scream".

[Picture: Dimension Films]

Hani