Shock 'em Dead

"Shock 'em Dead" aka "Rock 'em Dead" (1991, Mark Freed, Noma, Academy Entertainment) is a direct-to-VHS horror film about rock 'n' roll and voodoo.

Martin (Stephen Quadros) is a loser who can't play guitar no matter how hard he practices. He's working in a pizza shop, but aspires to join a local up-and-coming rock band. After quitting his job and having a disastrously bad audition, Martin sells his soul to the local voodoo lady in order to become a successful rock legend.

Martin transforms into Angel; a guitar god with a mansion, hot tub and sexy groupies. Unfortunately, however, losing his soul comes with a new hunger that needs to be satisfied and he needs to feed....

Can he make it in the world of rock? Can he win the heart of Lindsay (Traci Lords), the band's sexy manager? Can he get rid of that terrible lead singer? It's so exciting...

I put this film in the so-bad-it's-good category: it's hammy as hell, there's a lot of gratuitous boob flashing and the 'music' is terrible. Angel appears to develop unworldly guitar skills that just add to the ridiculous appeal of this daft bit of B-movie cinema.

So, the main lesson to be learned from this film is that soulless Martin is just as big an idiot as nerdy Martin. If you're given godly guitar powers and an almighty makeover, and essentially the world of awesome at your fingertips.... don't waste it by setting your sights so low. Numpty.

[Image: Noma, et al]

Hani

Street Trash

"Street Trash" (1987, J. Michael Muro, Street Trash Joint Venture, Lightning Pictures) is a bad taste body horror film about homeless people based in New York.

A liquor store owner discovers a case of old, cheap booze called Viper in his stock which has gone bad. But he decides to sell it cheap to the local homeless community. Unfortunately, Viper
causes anyone who drinks it to gruesomely melt to death.

The cops are trying to find the cause of these puddle-y deaths and also deal with Vietnam vet, Bronson, who has taken over the local junkyard as his own private, hobo kingdom.

A strange splatter film that makes other splatter films look sensible. This is definitely my favourite film about melting New York hobos... Possibly because it's also the only one! Gross, stupid and crude this film is just insane to the max.

The effects are daft, with the men and women melting into gooey primary colours, but also gross with body parts sagging off and splattering all over the place. The characters are oddly funny and sad and the film enjoys a grimy shock factor.

Some scenes of note include an excellent chase scene and a game of 'keep away' with a severed member instead of a lunchbox and a lady melting boobs first into a gooey mess.

Weird. So very, very weird.

[Image: Lightning Pictures]

Hani

Night of The Demons (1988)

"Night of The Demons" (1988, Kevin S. Tenney, Republic Pictures, International Film Marketing) is a Halloween party favourite and a must have for any cheesy horror movie night!

A group of teens decide to have a Halloween party in an old abandoned mortuary. Goth outcast, Angela (Mimi Kinkade), who's throwing the party, believes that the place is possessed by demonic spirits and wouldn't you know it, she's right! Soon everyone's getting possessed or trying to escape while their possessed friends get all kinky and weird around them.

It's all just good fun and delivers everything promised: boobs (and more... Any Linnea Quigley fans will be happy), gore, demoniacally possessed teens and some Scooby Doo Style chase scenes!

Some really cracking physical effects allow for that sought after 'ewww!' moment, including an eye popping scene that is really nasty in the best kind of way!

If you're looking for originality you're in the wrong place, but it's certainly sheer 80s awesomeness not to be missed!

[Image: Republic Pictures]

 

Hani