Selfie From Hell

"Selfie From Hell" (2018, Erdal Ceylan, IndustryWorks Pictures) is a modern technology horror.

When vlogger, Julia (Meelah Adams), falls mysteriously ill while visiting her cousin, Hannah (Alyson Walker), it prompts Hannah to go through Julia's vlogging videos where she discovers that her cousin is involved in dark stuff on the Deep Web. Oddly, Hannah is also receiving messages form Julia, despite Julia being unconscious. The deeper Hannah begins to dig, the more she too starts to notice a strange presence haunting her, too - especially when she attempts to take a selfie.

A plot that was an effective horror short loses something in becoming feature length. The film actually boasts some fun and competent effects which add to the tension in the horror scenes - particularly where the selfie taker is slowly stalked by the 'selfieman'. However, the overall feature is a little clunky and fails to deliver the scares promised by the short. The characters also make some extremely odd decisions (of course you'd dump your comatose cousin in your bed...) and don't successfully build a lot of sympathy from the audience.

[Image: IndustryWorks Pictures]

Hani

Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich

"Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich" (2018, Sonny Laguna, Tommy Wiklund, RLJE Films) is a reboot film to the franchise and is  canon to the original film.


Edgar (Thomas Lennon) returns to his parents house after the death of his brother and discovers a puppet in with his brother's things. But not any old puppet, it's a Blade puppet. A quick internet search tells Edgar that the Toulon puppet is valuable and that there is a Toulon murder convention nearby. Edgar, his new girlfriend, Ashley (Jenny Pellicer) and his best pal, Markowitz (Nelson Franklin), travel to the convention to learn more. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to them, the spirit of Andre Toulon (Udo Kier) and his murderous little creations are about to start a bloodbath.


A completely bonkers B-movie  that serves up some quality practical gore amongst ridiculous action, tongue-in-cheek scripting and a liberal serving of boobs, blood and bad taste humour. With a change to the previous films' plotline, Toulon is this time revealed to have Nazi ties and his puppets' evil ways lead to some creative death scenes. The movie throws everything it can at the audience, no matter how batshit crazy it may be. We are also introduced to a few more puppet characters, and the film opens up a few new doors for yet further sequels in the franchise.


Humorous, insane and close to the knuckle in most scenes this film manages to bring Toulon's puppets into the modern day in the true Puppet Master so-bad-it's-good spirit.

[Image: RLJE Films]

Hani

A Quiet Place

"A Quiet Place" (2018, John Krasinski, Platinum Dunes, Paramount Pictures) is a film blending drama, horror and sci-fi.

In a post apocalyptic world humans and animals are losing the fight for survival against monstrous, blind, carnivorous alien creatures who hunt by sound.

We follow the intrepid Abbott family who have survived through sheer ingenuity, sticking together and by being very, very quiet.

When tragedy strikes, the family are heartbroken, and although they continue to follow their closely maintained rules, some of the trust and closeness is gone. As they prepare for a new arrival in the family, they will come face to face with their hunters and must rely on each other in order to survive.

It's not often that a film with practically no spoken dialogue can be so engrossing, but "A Quiet Place" manages to achieve it. From the introductory scene, right through to the end the story is mostly portrayed through sign language, emphatic gesturing, looks and well placed tension. The characters are well rounded with flaws and strengths all portrayed believably by the cast.

The creature design is swift moving, but the scariest parts of this film don't always involve the baddies. The themes of solitude, beauty, dread and melancholy bring a depth to this film that isn't always easily created. A world where you cannot let your guard down.

A truly gorgeous, well made and intense horror film that may make you re-evaluate what scares you.

[Image: Paramount Pictures]

Hani

Leatherface

"Leatherface" (2017, Julien Maury, Alexandre Bustillo, Campbell Grobman Films, Mainline Pictures, Millennium Films, Lionsgate Films) is a prequel to the 1974 original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and the eighth film in the franchise. It is, however, admittedly only the third film in the franchise that I have personally watched. 

The film follows the character who will become Leatherface, Jed, giving some background on his upbringing and the traumatic events which lead him to become the chainsaw wielding, face-book collecting villain that we all know today.

The film has suffered some negative critical response which is largely undeserved in my view. It manages to exist within the same universe and setting as the 1974 original in a fairly believable way, despite being made more than 40 years later. The characters and action have a familiarity that ties it in to the franchise very well.

The Sawyer family are instantly recognisable as characters and are pitched at correct ages to tie in to the original film. Grandpa Sawyer particularly, in his more mobile 'youth', is a nice nod to the character's future. While the shock factor maintained within the original film is not reclaimed, "Leatherface" pays a strong homage to Hooper's original.

The identity of teenaged Jed is kept as a 'secret', although it's not exactly well hidden. However, he is joined by a host of other characters on, not a slasher style spree, but a Bonny and Clyde style kidnap roadtrip. This change of pace really appealed to me as it further explains the changes in Jed's mental situation from young man with some serious issues to young maniac intent on collecting faces. The film is not a purely Slasher film, managing to blend mental asylum, road trip, body horror and slasher genres into a gory adventure.

The death scenes are gruesome and intense with a bit of necrophilia also thrown in for added ick factor. This film certainly accomplished a few scenes which made me squirm.

An origin story for a much appreciated ('loved' seemed like the wrong word) horror icon that manages to create a worthy plot and character development, with strong performances from the cast. I'm not usually one for reboots, prequels and remakes, but for once this one played out as a refreshing change of pace, an homage to the original and not an attempt to kick start another wave of franchise additions or change the outcomes for the characters.

[Image: Lionsgate Films, et al]

Hani

The Ghost Goes West

"The Ghost Goes West" (1935, René Clair, London Film Productions, United Artists) is a British film about a haunted castle which is sold to an American family who wishes to transport it to America. Unfortunately, the ghost who dwells within the castle comes along for the ride.

Robert Donat stars as both Donald Glourie and his womanising, ghostly ancestor from the 18th century, Murdoch Glourie, who died a coward before battle, shaming his family and thus being trapped within the confines of his ornate home until he can put things to right.

Donald, in need of some cash and having fallen in love with Peggy Martin (Jean Parker), sells the castle to her unwitting father (Eugene Pallette). Unfortunately, the ghostly Murdoch also has designs on young Peggy and Donald begins to fear that he's made a terrible mistake, especially when the Americans begin to excitably attempt to exploit his intangible kinsman.

A pretty cheerful and humorous black and white film that manages to poke fun at the Americans and the Scots in equal measure.

Our non-corporeal anti-hero is not only a coward with a chick habit, he's also a stroppy young man, doomed to wander his ancestral home at his late father's behest. He is able, however, to kick his bad habits and make amends for his shameful ways with the help of his flesh and blood relative. Elsa Lanchester also plays a small role in this film.

The film boasts some excellent special effects for the time including the ghost's transition through walls and tables and randomly popping up to spook guests. There are also some amusing scenes showing the cruise liner taking the castle to the USA which were evidently achieved using a model boat in a basin of water. I love looking out for these kind of innovations in old films.

An entertaining little comedy.

[Image: London Film Productions]

Hani

Saturday the 14th

"Saturday the 14th" (1981, Howard R. Cohen, New World Pictures) is a horror spoof film.

John (Richard Benjamin) inherits a house from his uncle and moves in with his wife, Mary (Paula Prentiss), and their kids, Debbie (Kari Michaelsen) and Billy (Kevin Brando). The house isn't exactly what they'd envisaged and, when Billy finds a strange book, things begin to get weirder. To add to their problems, vampire couple, Waldemar (Jeffrey Tambor) and Yolanda (Nancy Lee Andrews), are desperate to get their hands on the house and, more importantly, that book.

John and Mary remain oblivious to all the weird happenings, and begin to plan a housewarming party which will result in some more antics. They also hire an owl exterminator (Severn Darden) to rid them of the strange noises heard throughout the house.... An exterminator who may have more of an idea of what's going on than the family do themselves.

Despite a fair few recognisable talents in the cast, the film can't shake off a distractingly stilted quality. A lot of gags fall a little flat also. However, it's oddly charming, if a little too silly to consider 'so bad it's good'. Not the best horror spoof out there.

[Image: New World Pictures]

Hani 

Garbage Pail Kids

"Garbage Pail Kids" (1987, Rod Amateau, Atlantic Entertainment Group, Topps Chewing Gum, Atlantic Releasing Corporation) is the live action movie based on the popular 80s parody trading cards.

A spaceship shaped like a metal trashcan somehow ends up under the protection of an antiques shop owner, Captain Manzini (Anthony Newley). It's never really explained how this comes to be. Manzini befriends a local kid called Dodger (Mackenzie Astin) who is getting relentlessly bullied by a group of older teens who look old enough to have mortgages. Dodger accidentally sets the garbage pail kids free during a scuffle with the bullies in the store, introducing us to seven of the kids: Greaser Greg (Phil Fondacaro & Jim Cummings). Valerie Vomit (Debbie Lee Carrington), Ali Gator (Kevin Thompson), Foul Phil (Robert Bell & Chloe Amateau), Nat Nerd (Larry Green & Jim Cummings), Windy Winston (Arturo Gil) and Messy Tessie (Sue Rossitto & Teri Benaron).

Together, Dodger and the gruesome kids attempt to help the girlfriend of one of Dodger's bullies on whom he has a crush. But Dodger is soon to learn that ugliness is not always on the outside...

A cheesy film full of disturbing puppets and toilet humour. It boasts a pretty flimsy plot and a sing-song that goes on way too long. I'm not sure what kind of bet Newley lost to be in this film, but I have to say that it kind of gives me a different kind of respect for him, really.

A film so bad that you just have to shake your head and wonder who the target audience really was. On one hand it is definitely not the kind of film most parents would want their kids to watch and on the other its humour does not really appeal to most adults. A really strange concept by all standards.

[Image: Atlantic Entertainment, et al]

Hani