Blood Monkey

"Blood Monkey" (2007, Robert Young, Thai Occidental Production, RHI Entertainment, Genius Entertainment) is a nature-bites-back adventure horror set in Thailand.

A group of student anthropologists travel to the jungle to assist Professor Conrad Hamilton (F. Murray Abraham) in his quest to capture a creature he believes to be the missing link in human evolution. Only, when the students arrive they discover that the initial research team are no longer there and the Professor and his somewhat sadistic assistant, Chenne (Prapimporn Karnchanda), are less than professional. Can they escape the jungle before the massive, bloodthirsty trophy specimen can brutally murder them all?

I will admit I watched this film for two reasons:

1. It is a B-movie with a pun title
2. I have a crush on Matt Ryan

I stayed for two reasons:

1. Matt Ryan
2. Matt Ryan using his own accent

Ok, a third reason: F. Murray Abraham hamming it up big style! If the scenery hadn't been potentially poisonous, he would have been chomping on it. 

This is a straight-to-DVD syfy movie so it plays out in a very by-the-numbers style: too much dialogue, not enough 'monster'. But it does have some entertaining effects when we finally do see some of our 'monkeys' and there was an abseiling scene which must have been sketchy to film...

It doesn't outstay its welcome at 90 minutes and delivers the anticipated levels of cheese, but it could have been doing with a little bit more monkey for our money. It's definitely a cautionary tale about outlandish uni trips with maniacal professors.

[Image: RHI Entertainment]

Hani

The Invisible Man (2020)

"The Invisible Man" (2020, Leigh Whannell, Blumhouse Productions, Nervous Tick, Goalpost Pictures, Universal Pictures) is a modern retelling of the classic H.G. Wells story, and a poignant story about control and abusive relationships.

Cecilia Kass (Elizabeth Moss) flees in the night from her rich boyfriend, Adrian (Oliver Jackson-Cohen) with the help of her sister, Emily (Harriet Dyer). The two women make their hasty escape, and Cecilia begins living temporarily with her cop friend, James (Aldis Hodge) and his teen daughter, Sydney (Storm Reid).

Cecilia is naturally affected by her ordeal and we learn that Adrian emotionally controlled her during their relationship and she lives in constant fear that he will find her and punish her for leaving. She also reveals that he'd boasted that she would 'never see him coming'.

James is supportive, but as Cecilia's behaviour becomes more erratic he, Emily and Sydney begin to distance themselves from her leaving her to the mercy of her unseen, controlling stalker, who is hellbent on ruining her life...

A film which is very uncomfortable in places and which does a great job of showcasing how a gaslit relationship can look from various angles (the friends', the sister's, the victim's). The action and horror scenes are excellently achieved and there's several parts where I found myself on the edge of my seat. There are a few holes that took me out of the film a bit - time seems to be an elastic concept at points with characters managing to achieve quite a lot in an extremely short space of time (i.e. the fastest and most efficient washing off of paint I've ever seen) and it seems that our titular invisible man is able to hold his bladder for quite an impressive amount of time. On the other hand, however, the modernising of the plot to be more technology based was extremely effective. My trypophobia was going off the charts in some places, though *shudder*.

Moss gives an excellent performance as Cecilia. We feel for her but we're also with her in her fight to prove her innocence. She's not a quitter, but she's also not a textbook heroine, either. She's normal, relate-able and fallible.

Jackson-Cohen also gives a great, if small (visibly) performance as our main antagonist. We never see the abuse first hand but his mastery is in his supposed reasonable demeanour.

Definitely a film worth checking out. It's currently available to rent online from various sources. As scary as a violent, malicious and invisible stalker is, the real horror comes from the helplessness our protagonist feels and they way that her control can be so easily taken away. That, and that whole trypophobia thing...

[Image: Blumhouse Productions]

Hani

Deliver Us From Evil

"Deliver Us From Evil" (2014, Scott Derrickson, Screen Gems, Jerry Bruckheimer Films, LStar Capital) is a possession/crime movie.


Based on the book by Ralph Sarchie himself, the film follows NYC cop, Ralph Sarchie (Eric Bana), as he joins forces with a young, troubled priest (Edgar Ramirez) on a quest to exorcise a group of ex-marines inflicted with a violent demonic entity.


While not quite matching up in quality or content to the likes of "Se7en", the film delivers a familiar crime plot with some nicely achieved horror elements. Sarchie and his partner, Butler (Joel McHale), come across as violent and flawed characters (what with their apparent thirst for a fight, even if they do only want to fight abusers and murderers). Sarchie is also portrayed as a disinterested family man and a man doubting his faith. So when he is called upon to battle the supernatural threat he seizes his opportunity to jump back onto the faith train and save the day.


The horror aspects are okay. We've got possessed people chucking babies into ravines, bricking people up into walls and doing a bit of parkour, all with an obsession with The Doors. Not to mention some fun scenes in the zoo where our protagonist finds himself a little too close for comfort with some of the residents and, of course, his daughter's haunted-ass owl toy. It sounds silly, and it is, but it's also incidentally humorous which I didn't hate. And the makeup/effects are good.


The film's message is a little sledgehammer-y, sloppy and ineffective. But I'm not a religious person so maybe it's just me. There's also some muddiness on whether Sarchie is the good guy or not. Bana's accent isn't stellar either, but if you can look past the film's flaws it is overall entertaining enough to spend a bit of time on. Even if it's mostly for this sodding owl...

[Image: Screen Gems, et al]

Hani

Inhuman Kiss

"Inhuman Kiss" aka "Sang Krasue" (Sitisiri Mongkolsiri, 2019, Nakid, CJ Major Entertainment, M Pictures, Transformation Films) is a Thai horror romance centred around the Southeast Asian myth of the female Krasue spirit (aka Kasu or Ahp); the flesh eating floating head of a beautiful woman trailing entrails and tentacles, and the male Krahang; a ferocious male spirit.

We meet four children, Sai, Noi, Jerd and Ting, who are playing in the forest near an abandoned house. Jerd tells the group that the house is haunted by the spirit of a woman and then the children play hide and seek in the house. 

Years later Ting (Darina Boonchu) is married with a baby, Sai (Phantira Pipityakorn) is training to be a nurse, Jerd (Sapol Assawamunkong) is working with Sai as well as falling in love with her and Noi (Oabnithi Wiwattanawarang) has moved away from the village to live in Bangkok, much to the despair of Sai, who is in love with him. Everyone seems to be getting on with their lives when suddenly Noi returns to the village with a band of hunters on the trail of a Krasue spirit who is killing and eating the livestock. But Sai discovers to her horror that the Krasue is actually a curse and she is the one they are hunting...

Having just appeared on Netflix, and seeing a clip of the insane Krasue transformation online, I knew this would be my kind of film. But I was pleasantly surprised to find it was much more than I had expected. The film delivers a full and interesting plot as well as the gore and effects and manages to strike a balance between the cheesiness of the action and the rather straight-faced character development of our main three characters; Sai, Jerd and Noi. With a run time of just over 2 hours, I had expected to feel things were dragging a little, but the film's action is quite evenly spaced and the run time wasn't really a factor.  The effects are excellently achieved, and I felt the fact it wasn't trying to be funny really worked in its favour. Definitely worth checking out.

[Image: Nakid, et al]

Hani

Land of the Minotaur

"Land of the Minotaur" aka "The Devil's Men" (1976, Kostas Karagiannis, Crown International Pictures) is a horror film set in 1970s Greece.


A group of archaeology-loving tourists begin to go missing when visiting a particular site. Could the shifty Baron Corofax (Peter Cushing) be involved? Could the whole town be in on it?! It's up to Irish Priest, Father Roche (Donald Pleasance), Milo Kaye (Mr Director himself, Kostas Karagiannis - billed here as Costas Skouras) and Laurie Gordon (Luan Peters) to uncover the mystery and put a stop to the worship and sacrifice to the Minotaur.


Both Cushing and Pleasance have led varied and extensive careers and were extremely supportive of the horror genre and its many aspiring creators, being game to appear in a true variety of quality of films. But, in spite of this, the biggest mystery by far is how they ended up in this one with so much screen time considering the other larger budget pieces they were in around the same time! Truly, we did not deserve them.


This film is a delightful piece of B-movie nonsense that includes;

• Donald Pleasance doing an Irish accent and wearing (and losing!) several hats,
• a few females in short shorts and other skimpy outfits,
• a creepy teenaged girl,
• a leading character resembling a young 70s Father Ted (I dare you to not think of it whilst watching Milo) who is nude quite a lot,
• cult worshippers in multi-coloured outfits (it seems the Baron got a discount on several metres of coloured satin at Remnant Kings - and those bejewelled eyeholes, dahling!),
• lots of shots of a convertible driving quite sensibly around Greece coupled with Donald Pleasance berating the driver for being careless,
• people haplessly digging up things on sites of archaeological interest with their bare hands,
• a mysteriously deserted town where the few townsfolk like to enjoy a beer with breakfast,
• Peter Cushing drinking beer and shooting a grandfather clock, and,
• lots of cult sacrifices to a statue of the Minotaur with a bad case of the fire sneezes and a dislike of people in his special room. 

At only 95 minutes long, it's also not too taxing a spectacle and is currently on Amazon Prime in the UK under it's UK title.

[Image: Crown International Pictures]

Hani

Color Out of Space (2019)

"Color Out of Space" (2019, Richard Stanley, SpectreVision, RLJE Films) is an adaptation of the short story of the same title by H.P. Lovecraft.


Theresa (Joely Richardson) and Nathan Gardner (Nicolas Cage) move their family into a large rural house while Theresa is recovering from cancer. The rural location, however, is meddling with Theresa's work and their kids; Lavinia (Madeleine Arthur), Jack (Julian Hilliard) and Benny (Brendan Meyer) are still adapting to the change. Lavinia also makes the acquaintance of Ward (Elliot Knight), a hydrologist doing a survey of the water table in the area.


One night a brilliantly coloured meteor hits nearby, resulting in a strange light around the area and the eruption of bright and alien vegetation. The family begin to experience further strange behaviours amongst themselves and their animals and things begin to become more and more alien.


A bit of a slow start delivers an eventual impressive pay off as things wind up and up throughout the run time. With some fun and disturbing body horror, a great amount of Lovecraft's work still in there and some beautiful and eerie visuals, the whole film is both entertaining and pretty.


The only factor that didn't seem to work for me was Nicolas Cage as the dad. The whole rest of the family seem to gel so well together as a believable unit but his style and tendency towards OTT acting felt out of place and jarring in what was otherwise a fantastic fantasy horror.

[Image: SpectreVision, et al]

Hani

Mandy

"Mandy" (2018, Panos Cosmatos, Spectrevision, Umedia, XYZ Films, RLJE Films) is an arthouse horror thriller starring Nicolas Cage.



Set in the 80s, we meet logger Red Miller (Nicolas Cage) and his fantasy artist and gas station attendant girlfriend, Mandy Bloom (Andrea Riseborough) at their lakeside cabin.


A cult calling themselves Children of the New Dawn along with the help of a drugged-up, cannibalistic biker gang called The Black Skulls, kidnap Mandy for their leader, Jeremiah Sand (Linus Roache). However, Mandy rejects Sand and he instead burns her alive in front of Red.


Red then goes on a vengeful rampage armed with a special crossbow, a handmade axe and a whole tonne of hallucinogenic drugs... Oh, and there's a chainsaw battle also.


For me, the description sounded a lot better than the finished article. While I don't dislike Nicolas Cage, there's only so much entertainment I can glean from the famous Cage Rage - and this film is chalk full of it. The plot is pretty simple and the imagery is often really creative but it's all done with a kind of pretentious smirk and a lot of colour filters and starts to wear after a while. Some scenes are fantastically metal but the style likes to jump all over the place. For a film where all the characters are on drugs, however, I guess this makes sense. I guess that's also true for the odd dialogue...


The film takes a while to get started, and when it finally does it jumps off the deep end in an impressive way. If it had been cheesier, it would have been superb. But the arthouse pretention keeps this for being a hit for me.

[Image: Spectrevision, et al]

Hani