The Mortuary Collection

"The Mortuary Collection" (2019, Ryan Spindell, Trapdoor Pictures, AMP International, Shudder) is a horror anthology film.

We are welcomed to The Raven's End Mortuary by creepy mortician and keeper of many stories, Montgomery Dark (Clancy Brown), who recounts a few of his tales to us and his new prospective apprentice, Sam (Caitlin Custer). 

A very fun collection of tales which fit nicely into the wraparound story and provide the right level of humour, familiarity and freshness to make this anthology a must-see. 

Each short links well to the wraparound, and the wraparound itself if an intriguing tale of its own.

Brown delivers Montgomery Dark with a relish that is utterly captivating and Custer provides not only some wit and cynicism but also a few surprises of her own.

The effects are on the whole excellent and enjoy an 80s style appeal without trying too hard to be too nostalgia driven. 

I don't want to go into too many details about the shorts because they are great fun and deserve to be seen, but this film has a few humorous and gory gems to share as well as some emotional moments that are really effective.

Definitely worth checking out and currently streaming on Shudder and available to buy on physical media.

[Image: Trapdoor Pictures, et al]

Hani

From a Whisper to a Scream

"From a Whisper to a Scream" (1987, Jeff Burr, Moviestore Entertainment) is a horror anthology.

Librarian, Julian White (Vincent Price), tells four tales centred around the evil effects of the town of Oldfield, Tennessee on its unlucky inhabitants.

The first tale centres around a man trying to date his glamorous boss.

The second is a tale about a wounded man who learns that there are downsides to eternal life.

The third is about a girl who falls in love with a carnival glass eater, with unfortunate results.

The final is about a group of Unionist soldiers at the end of the civil war who find themselves prisoners of some unusual and dangerous children.

While a little clunky in places and suffering from some pacing issues and a couple of weak segments, the film is still enjoyable for the occasional surprising scene, a couple of dark moments and, of course, Vincent Price.

[Image: Moviestore Entertainment]

Hani

Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

"Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" (2019, André Øvredal, Lionsgate, Entertainment One, CBS Films, Sean Daniel Company) is a film based on the series of short stories by Austin Schwartz.

A horror anthology aimed at teens (think "Creepshow" meets "Goosebumps"), the film is surprisingly jumpy and really well put together. We follow Stella (Zoe Margaret Colletti), Auggie (Gabriel Rush), Chuck (Austin Zajur) and Ramon (Michael Garza) who find the book of scary stories by Sarah Bellows, the town's local horror legend, on Halloween night. The stories not only have a horrible way of becoming reality, however, the group discover new stories are still being written from beyond the grave and people they know, including themselves, are the unlucky protagonists... Can they put a stop to Sarah before it's too late?

Although very heavy on CGI which may not age very well in the long run, the film has a neat wraparound story and enjoys a seasonal Halloween theme which could make it a fun addition to annual viewing.

The stories are well adapted for screen from the original tales and even those of us too old to enjoy the childhood nostalgia of the stories themselves, the film still captures the feel of the tales and makes an entertaining 120 minutes.

Our protagonists and even antagonist bully, Tommy (Austin Abrams), feel well rounded and give a good performance in their roles. The late 60s setting of the film seems somewhat incidental, but not the the film's overall detriment. In the main, the adult characters are kept to the periphery and leave the main work to the kids.

I was pleasantly surprised at how good the scares were. The film doesn't seem to shy away from being quite dark and it's certainly a film young me would have loved. For the adult viewer it will feel relatively trope-laden but it's a perfect film for younger horror-hounds in the making who want to see something scary but aren't quite ready for some of the more adult targeted films. It's a good gateway film and could have the staying power for longevity in the future.

[Image: Lionsgate, et al]

Hani

Minutes Past Midnight

"Minutes Past Midnight" (2016, Robert Boocheck, Lee Cronin, Francisco Sonic Kim, Ryan Lightbourn, Marc Martínez Jordán, Kevin McTurk, James Moran, Christian Rivers, Sid Zanforlin, Rue Morgue Magazine, Indiecan Entertainment, Unstable Ground Productions) is a horror anthology built up of selected shorts.

There are nine shorts in total comprising of (but not in the order of): Horrific; Ghost Train; Awake; Roid Rage; Timothy; The Mill at Calder's End; Crazy for You; Feeder; and Never Tear Us Apart.

The shorts each enjoy a different flavour of story telling and medium with some going for a more gory style and others entertaining a more ominous dread. The shorts each have their own merits, however, for me the "Ghost Train" stood out as a firm favourite both due to its intriguing plot and really nice setting.

Due to the diversity in the story telling, the film as a whole benefits from a varied and fresh feel, despite not really having a wraparound story to bring everything together.

I would definitely recommend giving it a try if you're looking for something snappy and interesting to watch.

[Image: Rue Morgue Magazine, et al]

Hani

Holidays

"Holidays" (2016, Kevin Smith, Gary Shore, Adam Egypt Mortimer, Scott Stewart, Nicholas McCarthy, Dennis Widmyer and Kevin Kolsch, Sarah Adina Smith and Anthony Scott Burns, Distant Corners Entertainment, XYZ Films) is a horror anthology inspired by different well-known Western holidays and celebrations.

Valentine's Day
A bullied teenaged girl has a crush on her swim coach and decides to get him something gruesome to show her feelings...

The characters are quite well built up in this short with a fun, if slightly predictable end. But the run time is very short in order to fit in the whole calendar and so the short suffers a little by having to pack everything in quickly, losing some of the pacing.

St. Patrick's Day
A teacher tries to make a withdrawn new child come out of her shell. The child informs her that she will only smile when she makes the teacher's deepest wish come true and leaves a small snake emblem on the desk. Over time, the teacher's wish comes true, but maybe not the way she really wanted.

A short that has some really good, creepy elements and a lot of potential, but just didn't have much to do with St. Patrick's day (other than snakes) and managed to feel oddly longer than the other shorts. It didn't pack the punch that the plot deserved.

Easter
A little girl sneaks downstairs the night before Easter to catch the Easter Bunny delivering her eggs, only he is not what she anticipated, and there is a penalty for seeing him in the flesh...

Probably the most successful short of this anthology, the plot packs a nice punch but the small run time and budget also limit it.

Mother's Day
A woman who cannot stop becoming pregnant every time she has sex is taken hostage by a coven of women who cannot have children.

A pretty horrific premise, but the short was a bit artsy and dithery and then switched direction completely again.

Father's Day
A woman finds an old cassette tape from her deceased father and listens to it. The voice on the tape takes her down memory lane (he recorded it whilst out walking with her younger self years before) and then asks her to go to a special location to meet him...

A beautifully made short that came together into an emotive piece. However, the time limit again robbed the plot of the finale it deserved and made the rest of the build up seem wasted.

Halloween
A douchebag who runs a pay-per-view webcam porn site using ladies he's lied to as his cam stars meets his deserving demise at the hands of his victims. Oh, and it's also set on Halloween.

This is the Kevin Smith piece. I like Kevin Smith, but his work can be very hit or miss for me. This one was a miss. My main problem with it was that it had very little to do with Halloween; the most horror-centric holiday on the calendar and you take it to this generic, anytime of year gore-fest. Talk about wasted opportunity. The short also tried to be funny, and also be serious and didn't seem to know what it was.

Christmas
Seth Green and Clare Grant star in this virtual reality/jingle-all-the way inspired piece. A man goes to extremes to ensure he gets the latest gadget for his family's Christmas; a UVU virtual reality visor which shows you the real you. However, he and his family may not be too comfortable with their real selves, or each other's selves once they plug in...

A good concept with some good scenes that are again reminiscent of older festive films. Although it wasn't the most engaging short in the bunch, it did its job.

New Year's Eve
A serial girlfriend murderer sets out to welcome in the new year his way....

A good short with some gore and a nice twist. It rounded off the anthology on a high after some obvious lows.

This anthology is a mixed bag containing a lot of misses. There's no enveloping story which could have brought it together and each segment is very short (even by anthology standards) and has to round off quickly often taking away from each piece's story somewhat. Some segments are better than others, but certainly none jumped out enough at me to make me want to rewatch this film again. I think each director was trying too hard to make their segment the 'weirdest' of the bunch and many veered too far away from their core holiday, losing the point of the film.

There are better anthologies out there which make this one look like a film student's 2nd year project.

[Image: XYZ Films]

Hani

Trilogy of Terror

"Trilogy of Terror" (1975, Dan Curtis, ABC, MPI Home Video) is a made-for-TV horror anthology starring the awesome Karen Black; one of my favourite scream queens.

All three stories are named after the women's names and all of the centric women are played by Karen Black who embodies the nerdy, the crazy, the devious, the shy and the terrified in her usual charismatic way.

Three fun stories, the first being about a college professor and her creepy student, the second about an unusual sisterly relationship and the third about a bullied young woman who purchases a Zuni fetish doll for her boyfriend. All three shorts are quirky, engaging and the right balance of cheesy TV 70s horror and good storytelling. My favourite is certainly the final piece, "Amelia", which is a kind of one-woman play. It really focuses on Black's ability to portray a whole plot through her acting and I absolutely love the creepy little doll. It's a really fun short.

Maybe it's not as sophisticated as today's horror and certainly it has its flaws (being too obvious for today's genre-savvy audience being one), but this remains one of the classic 70s anthologies and is definitely worth your time.

[Image: ABC]

Hani

Tales of Halloween

"Tales of Halloween" (2015, Neil Marshall, Darren Lynn Bousman, Axelle Carolyn, Lucky McKee, Andrew Kasch, Paul Solet, John Skipp, Adam Gierasch, Jace Anderson, Mike Mendez, Ryan Schifrin, Dave Parker, Epic Pictures, Film Entertainment Services) is a horror anthology of ten short films which are all interlocked.

With cameos from John Landis, Joe Dante, Barry Bostwick and Adrienne Barbeau (to name but a few), this horror anthology is a good bit of gory fun. 

Although the shorts are indeed.... short... they are entertaining. More often leaning to horror comedy than true horror, each story is a fun gem of cheesy, self awareness that's bound to please, with a few surprising twists which keep you keyed in on the action. I'll admit that some are of course, better than others (to my taste), but there's something in here for everyone. 

A great film for Halloween night.

[Image: Epic Pictures]

Hani

All Hallow's Eve

"All Hallow's Eve" (2013, Damien Leone, Ruthless Pictures) is a supernatural slasher about a killer clown and a VHS tape. With Halloween just around the corner, I thought I'd start looking at some films I haven't seen before.

Sarah (Katie Maquire) is babysitting Tia (Sydney Freihofer) and her brother Timmy (Cole Mathewson) on Halloween night. We all know that's a bad idea for a start. Timmy opens his trick or treat loot to find that some strange neighbour has put a VHS tape in instead of sweets. Sarah is obviously keen to check the tape's contents before letting the kids watch it. Personally, I would have just put that creepy shit in the bin, but whatever.

The tape turns out to be an anthology of murders which all feature Art the Creepy Clown (Mike Giannelli) in some way or other. Thinking it's just a somewhat disturbing movie, Sarah gives in and lets the kids watch some of it before putting them to bed. But Art the clown makes a special guest appearance later that night, with some unhappy results...

Art the clown was first invented for a short film called "The 9th Circle" in 2008 and was again seen in another short called "Terrifier" in 2011. He's a pretty creepy character, but the film doesn't do him justice as it's just not scary enough to make the most of him.

The film itself isn't awful by any means, but there are long boring stretches and the lack of dialogue in large segments of film, while mostly effective, result in a loss of interest from the viewer after a while. The subject matter is violent and gory with most of the action centering on the depraved clown who just seems to hate lone women and want to hurt them.

There are some really disturbing scenes and some good practical effects, considering the film's low budget. I particularly appreciated the beginning to the end of the wraparound plot, which is by far the best part of the film. Unfortunately, some other effects and costumes are much less effective (I'm sure I could get a more convincing alien costume in 'Poundland') and lose some of the viewer's engagement.

The whole VHS tape thing is becoming a trope of its own and I couldn't review this film without obviously comparing it to "The Ring" series and "V/H/S", which both enjoy much more scares than this one does, but also bigger budgets. One thing that "All Hallow's Eve" did do quite well was slowly make the babysitter's environment more menacing as the film went on.

They've tried to give the film a gritty, video tape vibe with some muting of colours etc. Each segment has a different post-production hue, which I liked.

So, it's not a masterpiece. I'm not a huge fan of torture-porn films and the low budget hindered some of the film's effectiveness. The overall linkage of the shorts is pretty sketchy, the actual shorts themselves are not great and some of the action is more funny or just gross than scary. But it shows a lot of potential from Damien Leone as his full length debut and Art the clown is truly very creepy.

[Image: Ruthless Pictures]

Hani

Body Bags

"Body Bags" (1993, John Carpenter, Tobe Hooper, 187 Corp., Showtime Networks) is a made for TV horror anthology set in a morgue. The film was initially meant to become a weekly show similar to "Tales from the Crypt" but was axed, and so the completed pieces were pieced together into an anthology.

A creepy coroner (John Carpenter) sets us up for each segment, inspired by the bodies he uncovers from the bags. There are three tales all-in:

The Gas Station
Anne (Alex Datcher) is a student starting her new part time job as the overnight petrol station attendant. As if that job is not just creepy enough, she has to deal with knowing that a dangerous lunatic has escaped the asylum (she was kindly warned by her new colleague, Bill (Robert Carradine)). Soon all of her customers appear to be a little strange and Anne is frantic, not knowing who could be the killer! Horror hero cameos include Wes Craven, Sam Raimi, David Naughton, George Buck Flower and Molly Cheek).

The short is a bit of a lark with so many horror favourites gracing the screen with their nutty characters and a fair bit of bludgeoning. While it's your typical 'lone woman being stalked by a serial killer' plot, it's fun in its familiarity and really kicks off the film.

Hair
Richard (Stacy Keach) is hitting middle age. His girlfriend, Megan (Sheena Easton), is getting exasperated by Richard's obsession with his looks and his quickly thinning locks. In his desperation, Richard signs up for a hair transplant operation which appears successful. Maybe a little too successful...

A bit of a laugh with some effects that aged a little, but add to the charm of the film. I thought I knew where this one was going but after a point it changes tack slightly which pleased me. Yes, it's hardly 'scary' but I don't watch old anthologies for scare factor, they're purely for comedy. Cameos include Debbie Harry and David Warner as the mad doctor and his nurse.

Eye
Brent Matthews (Mark Hamill) is a baseball player. He is involved in a car accident where his eye is gouged out. Brent opts for some experimental surgery that is not considered so sci-fi these days, and receives an eye transplant in the hopes that he can return to his beloved game. But, similarly to the later 2002 and 2008 Singaporean and American blockbusters both called "The Eye", he begins to see things that are not there through the new eye: horrible things. Brent becomes suspicious that his new eye belonged to a killer and goes back to the doctor to investigate. Brent realises that there is only one way to end this problem... Cameos include Twiggy and Roger Corman.

A few gruesome bits make this one entertaining but it was admittedly my least favourite short of the three. In retrospect this one seems very tropey, but it's not its fault; it came first afterall!

We end back in the morgue where our creepy coroner reveals he is more than at first appears.

The film comes off as surprisingly low budget, but this may just be a sign of ageing SFX. While it's nothing new in terms of plot or set up, it's a playful horror anthology and is funny, self aware and even a little gruesome at times. Team this one with Creepshow 1 and you're onto a bloody good night in!

[Image: 187 Corp.]

Hani

The House that Dripped Blood

"The House that Dripped Blood" (1971, Peter Duffell, Amicus Productions) is a British horror anthology about a cursed house which sees the strange and unusual deaths of its inhabitants. I actually watched it as part of my personal homage to the life and works of Christopher Lee upon his recent passing. But, in true Hani style, I didn't actually get around to writing up the blog post until now!

We follow Inspector Holloway (John Bennett) as he is summoned to solve the disappearance of someone in the house. He goes to the local police station where he is told several tales of the house's strange past and we are taken along for the ride.

Each short is about the house's previous inhabitants. There are 4 shorts in all.

"Method for Murder" starring Denholm Elliot, Joanna Dunham and Tom Adams is about a horror writer who begins to see his new creation stalking him. It's a nicely realised piece with some quite disturbing stealth stalking and an ending very typical of British horror shorts. But in a good way.

"Waxworks" stars the legendary Peter Cushing and Joss Ackland who are both friends who become obsessed with a local waxwork museum's prime attraction: a beautiful murderess who looks like someone they once knew. It was a little slow in the uptake, but had a lovely proper feel to it that made up for that. And who doesn't love a good severed head on a plate?

"Sweets to the sweet" stars the wonderful Christopher Lee as a widower with a young daughter (Chloe Franks) whom he treats very strictly, not even allowing her to play with dolls. The daughter's new home-school teacher (Nyree Dawn Porter) thinks that he is being very unfair and buys the girl a doll.... Big mistake. My favourite of the collection because it went a way I wasn't completely expecting. The young Chloe Franks also did a fantastic job as the creepy child.

"The Cloak" is the final short and stars Jon Pertwee as a horror movie actor/diva, who has moved into the house whilst shooting a vampire film. He sources a strange black cloak from a local antiques and oddities shop ran by Geoffrey Bayldon, only to find that the cloak has special powers. His co-star is the fabulous Ingrid Pitt.

The pieces aren't ground breaking storytelling, but they are all well made, star studded and engaging. The film holds together well as an anthology and keeps the viewer interested.

Images: Amicus Productions

Hani

V/H/S

"V/H/S" (2012, Adam Wingard, David Bruckner, Ti West, Glenn McQuaid, Joe Swanberg, Radio Silence, Bloody Disgusting, The Collective, Magnet Releasing) is a horror anthology done in the found footage style.

I was excited for this film after reading the blurb:

A group of violent hoodlums and criminals are offered the chance to make some extra cash if they can find a specific video tape containing a rare piece of found footage from an abandoned house. However, they get there to find that a corpse is sitting in the house in front of several old TV sets and there are hundreds of VHS tapes. We join them as they go through each tape, finding stranger and stranger footage as they go.

I'm a huge fan of horror anthologies and I thought that this enveloping plot sounded really creative. And it is. However my main criticism is that because the enveloping story is also done in found footage style, the whole film feels very jumpy and can be quite taxing to watch and follow.

There are five shorts in the film, not including the narrative tale about the video tape.

Amateur Night (directed by David Bruckner)
This short is about a group of guys out on a night out who have fitted a pair of thick rimmed spectacles with a camera and plan to take home some drunken females in order to film the resulting shenanigans. Unfortunately for them, they weren't too picky about which drunken females they have selected.

A very rapey tale that's premise is terrifying in a very real way. The short is well put together, is easy to follow as we see what our glasses toting would-be 'lover' sees, and the acting is good, especially that of Hannah Fierman (who plays Lily) and it's nicely gory.

My main issue with the story is that it just wasn't scary! It was obvious where the plot was heading, and if I'm honest, I was glad to see all those gits get ripped apart.


Second Honeymoon (directed by Ti West)
A married couple on their 'second honeymoon' receive a strange prediction from a theme park fortune telling attraction (similar to the movie 'Big') and who then are stalked in their motel room.

Slow burning and quite tense, the gore is kept at a minimum. There is also a twist, which I admittedly was not expecting, but I wasn't really scared.

Tuesday the 17th (directed by Glenn McQuaid)
A group of kids go for a camping trip at the lake (see what they did with the title, yet?). But, as they are settling down for a fun drunken night, it becomes apparent that their friend Wendy (Norma C. Quinones) has an ulterior motive for inviting everyone up there, and it might all be a trap!

Just a bit of fun with some dodgy camera effects and a well-trodden, recognisable setting.

The Sick Thing That Happened to Emily When She Was Younger (Directed by Joe Swanberg)
This one seems like a haunted house short of the same ilk as "Paranormal Activity", but it has a twist.

This one was the only short in this colletion that was actually verging on scary. I love a good ghosty jump scare, but I found the twist took away from what was a nice, traditional spooky short. Although, I did enjoy the extra twist which gave a new sick dimension to the James character.

10/31/98 (Directed by Radio Silence) 
A group of young people in fancy dress are heading to a Halloween party at a friend's house. They take a wrong turn without knowing it, and wind up in the wrong house only to find out that this house is haunted and, once inside, the spirits might not want them to leave.

Not the best haunted house short out there, the script seemed confused as to whether it was an all-out haunting or Poltergeist activity... But the bit with the car was pretty good!

...

For me, I was a bit disappointed after all of the hype! I would say that "V/H/S" was a 'hit and miss', but it was more like a 'hit and some misses'. I really should learn to avoid the hype and go in open minded...

A difficult one to fully judge as each horror segment has its own strengths and weaknesses, but on the whole I wasn't so enthralled with the full product.

[Image: Magnet Releasing]

 

Hani

Bloody Cuts : Lock Up

"Lock Up" (2013, www.bloodycuts.co.uk, Ben Kent, Ben Franklin, Jonny Franklin) is the first episode of the British online horror anthology, Bloody Cuts.

A man is the last at work and has to lock up the offices on his way out, but when the lights go out he begins to feel he may not be the only one there...!

Short, effective and straight to the point, "Lock Up" uses the simplicity of solitude and darkness to make the viewer feel the dread slowly build up. Very organic and nicely put together. An excellent hook for an altogether enjoyable collection!

[Image: www.bloodycuts.co.uk]

Hani

Bloody Cuts : Mother Died

"Mother Died" (Neill Gorton, Ben Franklin, www.bloodycuts.co.uk) is another of the British horror anthology, Bloody Cuts.

A dark and personal kind of film, we meet a daughter (Sarah Winter) who's mother has just died. I advise you do not know any more than that going in, as it makes what the daughter does much more sinister!

Quiet and short, with some nice effects and interesting camera angles, "Mother Died" adds a little something of interest to its genre, which is fast becoming boring with too many film makers going down the same path. Quite inspired.

[Image: www.bloodycuts.co.uk]

Hani

Bloody Cuts : Dead Man's Lake

"Dead Man's Lake" (2013, Ben Franklin, Jonny Franklin, Joel Morgan, www.bloodycuts.co.uk) is a short from the Bloody Cuts free online horror anthology.

Wow, this one blew me away! Set up like an 80s slasher, the opening credits are awesome! The title theme is spot on, the clothing is suitably 80s and yet it's all still very British.

Three friends go camping in the woods near Dodman's Lake. As the couple try to get all snuggly wuggly in their romantic setting, their explosive-obsessed friend is busy running around throwing fireworks.

But, unknown to them, someone else is there with them... Is it all it appears?

A tale with some jumps, some gore and a moral that's actually really heart wrenching, I recommend any slasher fans definitely give this one a look!

[Image: www.bloodycuts.co.uk]

Hani

Bloody Cuts : Don't Move

"Bloody Cuts" is a series of short horror films from some talented British folks. I only just discovered episode 8 today: "Don't Move" (Anthony Melton, David Scullion, 2013).

I love a good anthology and will make it my goal (post-Masters assignment) to watch and review them all asap!

A clever and tense little film, we find a group of friends in a darkened flat, unable to move as they are hunted by a demon who can sense movement. Slowly and intensively the demon takes down the remaining friends in some gruesome and bloody ways, as the others have to stand stock-still and listen.


Clever, brilliantly put together, with some eerie-as-hell sound effects and gory to boot, I thoroughly enjoyed "Don't Move" and would highly recommend you all get over there and watch it! Now! Shoo!

All of the shorts are available to watch online: http://www.bloodycuts.co.uk/ Enjoy!

[Image: www.bloodycuts.co.uk]

Hani

The ABCs of Death

"The ABCs of Death" (2012, Nacho Vigalondo, Adrian Garcia Bogliano, Ernesto Diaz Espinoza, Marcel Sarmiento, Angela Bettis, Noboru Iguchi, Andrew Traucki, Thomas Malling, Jorge Michel Grau, Yûdai Yamaguchi, Anders Morgenthaler, Timo Tjahjanto, Ti West, Banjong Pisanthanakun, Bruno Forzani, Héléne Cattet, Simon Rumley, Adam Wingard, Simon Barrett, Srdjan Spasojevic, Jake West, Lee Hardcastle, Ben Wheatley, Kaare Andrews, Jon Schnepp, Xavier Gens, Jason Eisener, Yoshihiro Nishimura, Drafthouse Films, Magnet Releasing).

"The ABCs of Death" is a 26-short anthology film, featuring a mini-film each from the above directors (or directive pair in some cases) based around one of the 26 letters of the alphabet. The film is 2hrs long-ish, and to be fair, it doesn't feel anywhere near this long as each short runs quickly onto the next in succession. It is, however, riddled with terrible mini-films which sadly overshadow some of the few really excellent shorts in the collection.

The film starts with a high point or two, but it's a severely mixed bag, and by the end I was glad to see the credits.

Some of the inspirational shorts are creative, violent, spooky, different and could be progressed easily into a full scale film. Some of the good, but maybe more average shorts are pretty standard and could really be thrown in with the likes seen in the latter day "Creepshow" films. Unfortunately there are also a majority of uninspired shorts which verge on the depraved (and not in the good way) and often jump the line into the simply stupid category. As much as the film moves quickly past these short little efforts, they unfortunately stick more in my mind than some of the good attempts.

Lots of toilet humour (although the claymation short was hilarious!), murders, vampires, paedophiles, animals, boobs and randomness. Some good, some terrible. The peaks certainly jump whole-heartedly into the troughs, but a cinematic experience to be had, for sure! Guaranteed you haven't seen anything like this before!

[Image: Drafthouse Films]

Hani

Trick 'r Treat

"Trick 'r Treat" (2007, Michael Dougherty, Legendary Pictures, Bad Hat Harry Productions, Warner Premiere) is a horror anthology similar to, but much less corny than, "Creepshow" (comic books, linking tales, recurring characters, enveloping time frames, main ominous framing character and dark humour...).

I really liked this film. I'd heard good things about it and was looking forward to it, but with caution, as you can so easily do this style of film wrong! However, it's based on a short animated film which was written and directed by Michael Dougherty also, so you know the original material has been used to full potential!

There are 4 main stories encased within the timeframe of one particular Halloween night in America, and each story interlinks in some way or another.

The whole feeling of the film is between humorous, tense and cheesey (an excellent combination), and each tale focuses on something different, while still keeping the main theme: don't disrespect All Hallow's Eve Traditions and don't blow out the pumpkin light!

The First Tale

Emma (Leslie Bibb) and her husband Henry (Tahmoh Penikett) are coming back from the town Halloween parade in costume.
Emma hates Halloween and Henry loves it (kind of like my boyfriend and I, but the opposite way around...). Emma's tired and pissed off. She tries to talk Henry into taking down the decorations (on Halloween!). Henry isn't keen (he wants to watch Halloween porn in bed). Emma gives in and tells him to go inside and she'll take down the decorations instead. Henry bounces into the doorway and gets his video tape set up. Yes, video tape.
Emma begins taking down the rather extravagant decorations when she feels like someone is watching her. She begins to look about, sees a creepy guy in a mask, staring at her. She jumps, but then the guy turns out to be waiting on a lift to a Halloween party. Emma is just about convinced that everything's safe when she is suddenly jumped by a small figure in a dust sheet!
When Henry comes outside to find out where she's gotten to, it's to find Emma's gory remains decorating the garden...
A simple and short beginning, it sets the film up with a nicely gore-soaked opening.

 The Principal

Steven Wilkins (Dylan Baker) is the principal of the school. He's a bit of a psycho, too. Upon finding a brutish young boy called Charlie (Brett Kelly) smashing pumpkins and stuffing his face with too much chocolate, Wilkins decides to teach him a lesson. A deadly lesson.

Shockingly funny, and decidedly gross, this short nearly put me off my dinner. The burial scene is enjoyable, though! There's an entertaining end scene, too. And keep your eyes peeled for related characters!

The School Bus Massacre Revisited

Throughout the other stories, we have seen some trick or treaters who are looking for, not sweets, but pumpkins.

These kids turn out to be Macy (Britt McKillip), Schrader (Jean-Luc Bilodeau), Sara (Isabelle Deluce), Chip (Alberto Ghisi) and eventually also strange fish Rhonda (Samm Todd).

They are lead by Macy to a cliff face, where she explains that a school bus full of children with special needs had been driven over by the bus driver, who was paid to do so. The driver hadn't intended to still be on the bus, however....

Macy states that she intends to honour Halloween by placing a pumpkin for each child victim near the waterside where the school bus and bodies still lie. The kids go down in a lift (or elevator), but is this little field trip all it appears? And was Rhonda invited along just to be nice to her?

A good little trip, there are some quite effective, if obvious jumps and again, I enjoy the ending!

Surprise Party

I like this story because I like Anna Pacquin and I like a good build up. This story begins with a bunch of 20-something year old girls. Most of the group are getting dressed in as little as possible for the big Halloween party in the woods. All but Laurie (Anna Pacquin). She covers up, and unlike the others can't find a date. Her elder sister is quite cruel, getting her ugly or old dates, and constantly telling her she 'needs to be herself'.
When Laurie finds a date he's not what she expected, but he's certainly not expecting her surprise either!

 Sam

Kreeg (Brian Cox) is a skanky old dude living with his dog. He enjoys frightening off Trick or Treaters with cruel tricks of his own. He's burning photos, and if you can guess who he is before it's given away, then you're paying attention!

He's all set to attack the next little kid who dares to chap his door when he finds out that some trick or treaters are not all they appear. Especially when they are Sam... Now, I'm going to hazard a guess that Sam's second name is Hain and when pronounced together he'd prefer you to call him 'Sow-en', because he's certainly a demon or the spirit of Halloween.

An exciting tale with an amazing performance from Brian Cox as the resilient old man! We even get to see what Sam's really made of, too.

Sam is creepy as! I love him!

A nicely rounded end which leads us (un)happily back to the start. I think this film is just what I wanted it to be, and with some good effects and some fun, gruesome humour in the mix, too. I think it's a new Halloween night favourite!

[Picture: Legendary Pictures, Bad Hat Harry Productions & Warner Premiere]

Hani

The Vault of Horror

"The Vault of Horror" (1973, Roy Ward Baker, Amicus Productions, 20th Century Fox) is a British horror anthology made after "Tales From The Crypt" but before "Creepshow" and based on the horror EC Comics. The cast were all famous names from the day.

The main story follows five men entering an office building in London and one by one entering a lift (or 'elevator' for all you non-British types). The lift quickly passes all of the floors the men had previously selected, and takes them instead to a sub-basement level.

The men enter this strange floor to find a table set with beverages and chairs, and also that the lift has no call button, meaning that they cannot now leave.

Being Englishmen, they decide to make the most of it and sit at the table to enjoy some free alcohol. Good on them, I say!

Being in a somewhat odd situation at the moment, their conversation soon comes to an odd theme: recurring nightmares. Each man describes his own hellish nightmare, each resulting in that man's death. They tell each one in great detail, and state how real the dream always is.

There are five stories, one for each man.

Midnight Mess
Harold Rogers (Daniel Massey - best known for being in "Roads to Freedom") kills his sister Donna (played by Daniel's realife sister, Anna Massey - best known for being in "Hotel du Lac") in cold blood in order to claim her inheritance. He then goes for spot of dinner in a local restaurant. Unfortunately for him, Donna's not the girl she was and this particular restaurant would rather serve him for dinner, than serve him dinner...

A nice little tale to start up the stories. A few nice touches such as the hilarious tap for blood letting. Story let down by terrible vampire fangs!

The Neat Job
Arthur (Thomas Terry Hoar-Stevens aka Terry-Thomas - best known for his many roles as the typical toffee-nosed Cad in British film, but I personally recognise him from "Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines" and "Munster, go home!") is a neat freak. His poor wife Eleanor (Glynis Johns - fondly known as the mother in "Mary Poppins"), a young wife who is not a neat freak, has a terrible time putting up with his constant nagging and increasingly violent (by the day's standards) outbursts. She eventually can't stand anymore....

Excellent build up, I knew what was coming, but I loved every minute of it! Eleanor's tears were very believable, and I loved the neatly labelled jars and elongated maniacal laughter!

This Trick'll Kill You
Sebastian (Curd Jürgens - "The Spy Who Loved Me") is a magician/illusionist on holiday with his magician's assistant wife, Inez (Dawn Addams - "The Moon is Blue") in India. After publically humiliating a local illusionist in front of his audience, Sebastian is later intrigued by the illusionist's assistant who is a rope charmer. When she will not sell him the trick, he talks her into coming to his hotel room to show his 'sick' wife. He then kills the girl and tries to charm the rope. Unfortunately for him, the rope has a mind of its own and has taken a severe dislike to him!

A good, well paced short with some impressive scenes of the rope moving on its own. The scenes where it attacks Sebastian are not great, but this is the 70s!

Bargain in Death
A man, Maitland (Michael Craig), is seen awakening in his coffin. He slowly begins to remember how this situation occurred. Safe to say he's made a grave (get it?) error in trusting his pal Alex (Edward Judd)... Things turn for the worse when two young medical students turn up with a grave robber to steal Maitland's corpse!

Really good. The scenes inside the coffin are excellent and the ending is worth a smile!

Drawn and Quartered
Moore (Tom Baker - known to most people as Doctor Who - the 4th Doctor) is a struggling artist in Haiti. He learns from an acquaintance that his paintings which he had sold for virtually nothing to a London art dealer after terrible reviews and rejections, are now being sold for a lot of money! Furious when he learns that he has been cheated by the art world, he visits a local Voodoo Priest and asks for a way to pay them back for the wrongs they have done to him. His wish is granted, but he should be more careful how he uses it and what he paints in future.

An excellent story which takes voodoo out of the zombie territory and into a more "Dorian Grey"-esque realm. There's even some lovely gore, but remember it's a 70s British horror, this ain't no "Driller Killer"! Don't expect too much blood.
Very well paced and my favourite of the lot, not just because Tom Baker is a legend!

The film ends with a nice twist, where the lift doors open to reveal a graveyard, and we learn of the men's true fate and their reason for meeting.

Nicely haunting and well laid out, this film encompasses everything that horror comics did/do. I recommend!

[Picture: 20th Century Fox]

Hani

The Monster Club

"The Monster Club" (1980, Roy Ward Baker, Amicus Productions) is a British horror anthology based on short stories written by R. Chetwynd-Hayes.

The author, Chetwynd-Hayes (John Carradine) bumps into a strange fellow, Eramus the starving vampire (Vincent Price) who asks him if he could feed off of him in return for some monster stories.

Eramus takes Chetwynd-Hayes to a local club known as 'The Monster Club' which is pretty much a cabaret bar for the supernatural.

The film jumps from the vampire and the author enjoying the evening in the club, the acts going on in the club and also the stories acted out as Eramus tells them. The stories focus on three different supernatural creatures.

The Shadmock

This story is a story with a lesson. Very similar in style to some of Stephen King's 'Creepshow' shorts.

A young woman, Angela (Barbara Kellerman), decides to take a job with a rich, reclusive man (who's not a man, but infact a Shadmock - a supernatural hybrid creature with a terrible whistle which can kill!) called Raven (James Laurenson). She is to work with him in his secluded mansion, categorising his antiques.

Raven is odd, awkward and odd-looking. Angela is at first repulsed by him, but eventually becomes friends with him. She finds, however, that some of his stuff is really very valuable, and she and her boyfriend decide to take advantage of Raven's kind personality and rob him.

Unfortunately, Raven takes Angela's 'kindnesses' the wrong way and proposes to her. Shocked, she declines and rushes her attempt to rob him. Catching her in the act, Raven uses his terrible superpower on her! Seeing the results of the creature's whistle, Angela's boyfriend runs for it, but loses his mind.

And the moral of the story? Don't be a dick.

The Vampires

Eramus decides to tell Chetwynd-Hayes of his own kind, but not his own story. This isn't an Anne Rice novel, after all!

A young bullied boy (Warren Saire) and his parents live quiet lives. The boy's father (Richard Johnson) works nights and his mother (Britt Ekland) constantly reassures her son that he is destined for greatness and that he is to be aware of men in suits carrying cases.

The boy discovers that his father is in fact a vampire! Unfortunately, a bunch of vampire hunters also become aware of this...

A nice little tale with a good ending.

The Ghouls / The Humegoo

A movie director looking for a spot to film his next works discovers an uncharted little town. Unfortunately, the town is home to only Luna (a seemingly innocent girl who is in fact a Humegoo, or human-ghoul hybrid) and a bunch of man-eating ghouls.

Can he fend off the hordes of man-eaters and save Luna? Well, he can try.

Eramus then goes on to detail how many different ways humans have concocted to kill one another, formally announcing the horror writer to be an honourary member of the 'Monster Club'.

Some very late 70s and early 80s music acts, some terrible monster masks and an entertaining strip tease (right down to her bare bones!) make this movie a small cult hit. But it's mainly notable for the presence of both Price and Carradine; horror legends!

Cheesey, British, horror anthology fun.

Carradine and Price discuss monster geneology and breeding

[Picture: Amicus Productions]