Suspiria (2018)

"Suspiria" (2018, Luca Guadagnino K Period Media, Frenesy Film Company, Videa Mythology Entertainment, Memo Films, Vega Baby) is the arthouse re-imagining of the 1977 Dario Argento film of the same name.

Susie Bannion (Dakota Johnson) leaves Ohio and enrols in a dance academy in West Berlin. She becomes the favourite of the instructor, Madame Blanc (Tilda Swinton), but begins to suspect that something very strange is going on at the school as she and her friend Sara (Mia Goth) begin investigating. At the same time, a psychologist (also Swinton in impressive prosthetics making this, minus some minor roles, an all-female cast) is investigating the school after the disappearance of  his patient, Patricia (Chloë Grace Moretz), who had left journals stating that she believed the matrons of the school to be witches.

Cards on the table I did not love this film. I found the length excessive with long winded shots and scenes that seemed artsy for the sake of it, rather than a statement or style. The film's pacing was tedious and I found the plot to be somewhat incoherent (and that's saying something from me, a fan of some of the most incoherent B-movies ever made). The whole side-plot with the Doctor seemed unnecessary and the grim styling, which I'll get to below, coupled with the pacing made the film seem even slower. Unlike the original, the remake also didn't have a strong memorable score. In honesty, I can't imagine how this could be achieved without infringing on the original, but I felt that I barely noticed the score at all.

That's not to say that I didn't find things I liked about the film. The styling and colouration of the original could not be matched or recreated without seeming like a pointless copy, so I admire the direction of Guadagnino to go his own way. The style seems consistent with West Berlin in the 70s. The scenery is also reminiscent of the original but much more drab, grey and gritty. I also appreciated that the film was immersed completely in its German setting. As a German language learner I was thrilled to pick up most of the German dialogue without the need of subtitles. However, for non-speakers of the language it perhaps made a long film feel even longer.

The body-horror elements were really good; lots of bone breaking, gut spilling and pants pissing, and a very chaotic and Giallo-homage ridden scene filled to the brim with nude dancers and grizzled old witches. However, the journey to reach the payoffs was long and, although the gore and effects were stunning, even these scenes seemed overly long and lingered too much which, for me, robbed them of some of their effect.

While I didn't hate the film, I am unlikely to watch it again and view it as an experience as a genre fan, rather than a piece of entertainment. Clearly it just isn't for me.

[Image: K Period Media, et al]

Hani

Suspiria

"Suspiria" (Dario Argento, 1977, Seda Spettacoli, Produzioni Atlas Consorziate) is a supernatural Giallo horror set in Freiburg, Germany.

Suzy Bannion (Jessica Harper) is a young American ballet student who enrols at a prestigious German dance academy. In a memorable opening scene she arrives at the school at night during a thunderstorm to find the building locked up. Before giving in and leaving to try again during the day she glimpses what appears to be another student leaving the school in a panic and running into the woods. The next day Suzy is welcomed to the school by the stern Miss Tanner (Alida Valli) and headmistress, Madam Blanc (Joan Bennett), but learns of the grim murder of one of the students; the girl she saw running the previous night... During her studies, and having befriended neighbouring student, Sara (Stefania Casini), Suzy begins to suspect that something very grim is going on at the academy...

An intriguing film that enjoys stunning scenes. The lavish styling, setting and lighting are some of the most recognisable in film. The scoring by prog-rock band Goblin is also very unique, striking and effective. I am also a fan of the wardrobe. Every character is adorned in some beautiful garment or quirky suit - it's a real stylish piece of cinema.

Harper provides a strong but sympathetic protagonist who spends the duration of the film working things out head-on and without shying away. As with most movies of this type, keeping up with the plot can be an exercise and it's the kind of film that seems to unlock more and more detail with each viewing. We are treated with action from the onset with stabbings, hangings, razor wire pits and reanimated corpses to keep us entertained.

There's very little reference made in the film, aside from the introduction, of it being set in Germany and the scenes involving Dr. Mandel and Professor Milius can seem a little jarring and out of place. But the beauty of this movie is in its stylish flair and the urgency of its pacing.

I was first introduced to this film at an all-night horror film festival and I have enjoyed many re-watches since then. It is also the first of Argento's "The Three Mothers" trilogy.

[Image:  Produzioni Atlas Consorziate]

Hani

The Beyond

"The Beyond" (1981, Lucio Fulci, Fulvia Film) is a supernatural horror.

Liza ( Catriona MacColl) inherits the defunct Seven Doors Hotel in Louisiana and plans to reopen it. Unbeknownst to her. an angry mob had killed a suspected warlock in the hotel in the 1920s as he completed a disturbing painting which they believed would open a doorway to death.

Liza is determined to push on with her renovation of the hotel and dismisses any warnings telling her to stop; be they from the creepy blind chick, Emily (Cinzia Monreale), or the sudden, gruesome death of her plumber, Joe (Giovanni De Nava) during maintenance work in the hotel's basement. As things begin to get weird, Liza seeks help from Dr. McCabe (David Warbeck) who believes that there must be a logical explanation for all the weirdness. Much to their disappointment, they are soon proved wrong...

A fun, juicy Fulci classic that brings a lot of beautiful, dark imagery punctuated with a lot of gore and an equal amount of weird dialogue and somewhat meandering plot. We are also treated to the longest, most intense scene about a man's face being devoured by a mixture of real and puppet tarantulas ever. Complete with odd, chirpy sound effects!

The plot can be fairly incoherent and our characters are prone to bad decision making... The dead are coming back to life? Let's hide in the hospital morgue! But any fan of Lucio Fulci in general will probably find this film entertaining and worthy of  a watch. If you're feeling really keen you could enjoy the full Gates of Hell Trilogy and team this film up with its 1980 forerunner "City of the Living Dead" and its classy little sister (and personal favourite of mine) "The House by the Cemetery" (1981).

[Image: Fulvia Films]

Hani

Nightmare Castle

"Nightmare Castle" (1965, Mario Caiano, Cinematografica Emmeci) is a fun black and white Italian horror riddled with well trodden tropes and perfect for scratching a gothic horror itch. It's maybe not the best Italian horror of the time, but it's certainly worth viewing and will appeal to many fans of the genre.

Dr. Stephen Arrowsmith (Paul Meuller) is a mad scientist living in the grand ancestral castle home of his gorgeous and gothic wife, Muriel (Barbara Steele). Muriel, however, is having a steamy affair with their gardener, David. Upon catching the pair mid-embrace in the greenhouse, Stephen flies into a rage and beats the gardener before chaining both of them up and torturing them to death.

Using mad science (it's very different from normal science), Stephen then uses the blood of his victims to give his elderly servant, Solange, youth, turning her into the beautiful Helga Liné. Stephen and Solange then begin a relationship of their own, while the souls of Muriel and David are trapped in the castle by the their disembodied hearts skewered within an urn in the main hall.

To his dismay, however, Stephen learns that he was not Muriel's heir and that the castle has passed to her stepsister Jenny (also Barbara Steele) who currently resides in a mental institution. Seeing an opportunity, Stephen quickly marries the poor girl and drags her to the castle to live with him and Solange while he continues both his experiments and the affair with Solange.

Jenny begins to feel terrified, claiming to hear the spirits in the castle and beginning to take on the characteristics of her dear departed half sister. Finding Jenny's behaviour uncomfortable, and keen to declare her insane (but still married) so he can have his cake and eat it, Stephen calls for Jenny's doctor, Dr. Derek Joyce (Marino Masé) to the castle to treat her. However, the Dr. begins to suspect that there are supernatural forces at work and accidentally releases the vengeful spirits of the dead lovers to wreak havoc on those who wronged them!

Critics of the time considered this film to be too tropey. They threw around words like 'pedestrian' and 'obvious'. And while I can appreciate that the film certainly contains a lot of characteristics prevalent in many horrors from that period, it does so with a charm and clarity that many other films were devoid of. The drama between the characters is well achieved, and the strange and mostly undeveloped sub-plot of rejuvenating youth aside, the plot moves on at a good pace.

Barbara Steele gives us two very distinct characters with the sultry vixen Muriel being the antithesis of her nervous and pure stepsister, Jenny. We are also treated to a period clothing undressing scene that would put many a modern burlesque performer to shame.

The film also boasts some practical effects that still stand well to the modern viewer and a convincing entrance for our ghostly characters upon their release from the urn. While it's unlikely to have you shaking in your boots, it certainly has an ethereal and atmospheric charm that is exactly what I'm looking for in a gothic horror.

If you're looking for a Halloween warm-up film available to stream on Amazon you could do a lot worse than a visit to this drama-filled stately home set in Rome.

[Image: Cinematografica Emmeci]

Hani

Masque of the Red Death

"Masque of the Red Death" (1964, Roger Corman, Alta Vista Productions) is the film version of Edgar Allan Poe's story of the same name.

Prince Prospero (Vincent Price) terrorises a plague-ridden, medieval Italian village whilst holding lavish parties in his castle home with the local, desperate but disillusioned gentry and a young, red-headed village maiden named Francesca (Jane Asher) whom he is holding captive.

The film boasts a macabre, spiteful and gleefully malicious prince in the form of Vincent Price, but we are also treated to a devious, dwarf court entertainer named Hop-Toad (Skip Martin) who likes his revenge served searing hot, a surprisingly strong female lead and two heroes, Francesca's lover, Gino (David Weston), and her father, Ludovico (Nigel Green). Ever present also, is The Red Death (John Westbrook), for you see death comes in all colours!

The Masque was to be one of Corman's most faithful Poe adaptations, and gladly so as the story is so outlandish and fun that there was little need to change it. The sets, costumes and colours are fabulous and lavish; well suited to the tale.

The gothic surroundings, debauched party atmosphere and the final lesson: that death does not discriminate, come together as a fun and characteristically cheesy horror tale.

[Image: Alta Vista Productions]

Hani

Manhattan Baby

"Manhattan Baby" aka "L'Occhio del male" (1982, Lucio Fulci, Fulvia Film) is an Italian giallo horror film from 'godfather of gore', Lucio Fulci. That makes it sound good. Don't get your hopes up too much...

The film serves as one of Fulci's weakest in my book, and certainly a far cry from his masterpiece, and a personal favourite of mine; "The House by the Cemetery".

We follow young Susie (Brigitta Boccoli) who, whilst in Egypt with her parents, Professor George Hacker (Christopher Connelly) and Emily Hacker (Laura Lenzi), is given a mysterious amulet by a strange, blind woman. Upon Susie receiving this unusual treasure, her father is struck blind whilst in an unexplored tomb and the family have to return immediately home to New York city.

While her parents fret over George's temporary blindness, Susie shows her new shiny thing to her younger brother, Tommy (Giovanni Frezza), and both siblings begin to fall under the amulet's power. This includes the ability to pop off on adventures to Egypt whenever they like, bring back poisonous creatures, ship off people who annoy them to the desert and summon the shambling undead.... Kids stuff, really.

As well as suffering from being very slow and somewhat dull, the plot jumps randomly from scene to scene making everything hard to follow and becoming a chore to watch. The characters also don't behave quite human enough: no one seems to notice all the missing people for starters!

One thing I did enjoy was watching George walk around with his glasses on over his massive eye bandages. Truly weird.

The film just lacks atmosphere and coherence and not even a zombie bird attack scene can save it from that!

I do love the DVD cover art, though

[Image: Fulvia Film]

 

Hani

Don't Look Now

"Don't Look Now" (1973, Nicolas Roeg, Casey Productions, Eldorado Films, British Lion Films) is an independent Italian-British film.It's actually based on a short story by Daphne du Maurier.

John (Donald Sutherland) and Laura (Julie Christie) have recently moved to the city of Venice after their daughter, Christine (Sharon Williams), had tragically drowned at their home in England (because the first thing you'd want to do after a water-related tragedy is move somewhere that is full of water...).

Whilst eating out, Laura meets two elderly sisters, Heather (Hilary Mason) and Wendy (Clelia Matania). Heather is blind and claims to be psychic. She tells Laura that she has spoken to her daughter from beyond the grave and that she is happy.

Although sceptical at first, John begins to see creepy things himself one of which is a child wearing a red coat similar to the one his daughter was wearing the day that she drowned... Despite being warned by Heather to leave Venice, John continues to search for answers, and it may not be ghosts that he's seeing...

A really intriguing and weird film with beautiful scenery, a slightly confusing, but engaging plot and a few nice twists and turns along the way. The story is really a study on grief and eloquently captures the journey of this couple's grief. It's not a horror in the usual sense, more a thriller, but has some really key horror aspects to it that make it a haunting and classic tale.

[Image: Casey Productions, et al]

Hani

Cannibal Holocaust

"Cannibal Holocaust" (1980, Ruggero Deodato, United Artists) is an Italian cannibal exploitation movie about a group of young people, lead by Alan Yates (Gabriel Yorke), who go into the Amazon Rainforest to film a documentary about cannibal tribes and fail to return.

We follow Prof. Harold Monroe (Robert Kerman) who has been tasked with going into the rainforest to search for the missing film makers. He is helped by the military who take a young indigenous tribesman hostage to help them bargain with the tribes.

During their journey they come across some horrific scenes of cannibalism and butchery of wildlife. After randomly bathing naked, Monroe and his team are taken to the cannibals' place of worship where they have to join in the feast in exchange for getting the remaining film cannisters back from the first group, who they have learned by now are dead and eaten.

Monroe takes the surviving film back to New York where he learns from watching it that Yates and his team were far from nice people and possibly deserving of their horrific fates...

Essentially this film is gross. Gross beyond gross. The number of real animals slaughtered live on camera is just sickening and, considering that is just for the film's benefit, kind of marrs any comment the film was making about documentaries creating situations for effect... One particularly graphic scene involving a monkey's face and a knife I'll never unsee. There is also a lot of torture of women and sexual violence, the iconic skewered woman scene and the slicing of body parts for food. I'm not afraid of gore. I enjoy gore, even. But I like my gore fun and fake.

Really the film is more than just a gross out movie about cannibals, but the style of it was more car crash than intrigue: I couldn't look away but I wasn't enjoying what I was seeing. It's a social commentary about journalistic practice, integrity and ethics. But it's also a shock-film made to make you squirm, and while it is highly successful in doing that, I wouldn't say that I enjoyed it or would put myself through watching it again.

Image: United Artists

Hani

The New York Ripper

"The New York Ripper" (aka "Lo squartatore di New York", 1982, Lucio Fulci, Fulvia Film) is an Italian giallo film based in New York. It was also the subject of much censorship and banning.

I'm visiting NYC soon for my first trip there, so naturally, my first line of research into the city is to watch an Italian made slasher film. I'm sure it's very representative... Ok, no. At least I hope not!

So this film is chalk full of prostitutes, burnt out detectives, scantily clad young ladies, mental old ladies and mysterious slasher killers speaking like Donald Duck, only more psychotic. There's not much in the way of plot and pretty much every second scene is NSFW due to nudity, sexual acts... etc...

A strange film which is all about the (hopefully exaggerated) older, sleazier side of New York's culture. Fulci shows unflinching scenes of attacks on women by his deranged killer with some truly gross effects. Usually, this would not phase me, but the film is possibly just a little too sleazy for me. It's not an enjoyable gross-out-fest, it's just a bit uncomfortable to watch.

The cartoony voice does serve its purpose, that of making this film memorable, but on the whole it kind of negates any threat the killer had. Essentially, we are just lurching from kill to kill at a slow, drunken pace whilst our detective goes down all the wrong paths on his investigation.

Not the best example of Fulci's work.

[Image: Fulvia Film]

Hani

The Black Cat

"The Black Cat" aka "Gatto Nero" (1981, Lucio Fulci, Shameless Screen Entertainment) is a film loosely based on the Edgar Allen Poe story.

A black cat stalks an English town, killing under the orders of its master, Psychic Medium Professor Miles (Patrick Magee). However, it would seem that the murderous moggy has turned upon its master, and is now killing at its own will!

It's not on the level of "House by the Cemetery" and its gore cannot compare to many of Fulci's other works, but "The Black Cat" is a moody piece with some very good scenes.

Whilst it's not likely to give you many nightmares, and it does suffer from long dull scenes between kills, it has the same wonderful charm of many Fulci pieces added to some nicely selected scenery.

Underrated, but admittedly completely batshit insane with a thin, shaky plot.

 

 

[Image: Shameless Screen Entertainment]

Hani

Stage Fright

"Stage Fright" aka "Stage Fright: Aquarius" aka "Deliria" (1987, Michele Soavi, DMV Distribuzione Filmirage) is an Italian/American slasher film set in a theatre.

 A troupe of actors are rehearsing a crappy, artsy musical about a masked killer called the Night Owl, when some real killings are discovered to have taken place. Could it be that a real Night Owl has returned to roost, claimed his mask and is on the hunt for more prey? Too many bird of prey jokes? Yes? Who will survive now that they are all locked inside with the killer?

A fun film, Soavi enjoys tricking his audience with misleading and cleverly panned shots. The characters are surprisingly well rounded despite a lack of deep back story. And this was Soavi's debut as a director, so I think he did rather well.

Our killer is wonderfully menacing with an extravagant mask and a dancer's style. He's also willing to use different tools from drills to axes. You've got to respect a man who can adapt to a situation.

Not the most technically advanced film in the world, but definitely fun, and with a distinctive feeling of Italian horror cinema, even when it was beginning to wane as a genre.

It's full of plot holes, some bad dubbing and some extremely B-movie acting, too.

 

 

[Image: DMV Distribuzione Filmirage]

 

Hani

The Wax Mask

"The Wax Mask" (1997, Sergio Stivaletti, Dario Argento, Lucio Fulci, Cine 2000, Mediaset, France Film International, Italian International Film) is a wax museum film.

Fulci died making this film and so I'm not 100% sure how true the end result is to his script, but it is indeed a lot of fun to watch.

With a kind of incidental Steampunk style (incidental because, as far as I'm aware, there was no such genre as 'Steampunk' in 1997), The Wax Mask tells a tale set in 1900s Paris. We see a couple brutally (and hilariously) butchered by a man with a clawed metal hand. We also see a young girl, their daughter, cowering under the bed.

Years pass and said young girl is now a costume maker working at a wax museum. The museum has gained some disrepute due to its gory collection of sculptures and, after the death of a young man who was dared to stay the night, the museum becomes more and more creepy.

It's fun, gothic and a little gory. The effects are nice and the props are awesome. The story is a little average as far as wax museum films go, but there's a nice added Frankenstein element which is fun. 

I'm not a huge fan of the ending, however, which seemed a little diverted from the rest of the film's styling, and I think I prefer the Italian version with the subtitles to the dubbed English, which can make the acting seem a little odd.

All in all, worth your while, but not a great representation of Argento, Fulci or Stivaletti.

[Image: Cine 2000]

 

Hani

The Others

"The Others" (2001, Alejandro Amenábar, StudioCanal, Warner Bros., Las Producciones del Escorpion, Cruise/Wagner Productions) is a haunted house movie and a psychological thriller.

Grace (Nicole Kidman), a devout Christian, is raising her young children Anne (Alakina Mann) and Nicholas (James Bentley) alone in her large country manor home in Jersey while her husband, Charles (Christopher Eccleston), is away fighting in World War One. Both children suffer from an uncommon disease and are photosensitive so the curtains are always closed.

Just as she needs them, three new servants turn up at the house hoping for work: a maid and nanny, Mrs Mills (Fionnula Flanagan), a gardener called Mr. Tuttle (Eric Sykes) and a young mute girl called Lydia (Elaine Cassidy).

The children are determined that the house is haunted by several spirits, especially that of a young boy called Victor, but Grace pooh-poohs this. That is until she begins to suspect something is wrong herself.

A quiet and slow-burning film that has the feeling of an older horror-thriller. Well paced and intriguing enough not to become boring, but it doesn't make use of many jump scares and uses very few effects.

The child actors are terrific and really give an excellent performance. However, perhaps having seen too many twist endings in my time, and regardless of clever suspense building techniques, I guessed what was coming a lot earlier than I would have preferred.

Regardless, it's a good story and has a darker element to it than you might expect.

[Image: StudioCanal & Warner Bros.]

Hani

The House by The Cemetery

"The House by The Cemetery" (1981, Lucio Fulci, Fulvia Film, Arrowdrome) is an infamous Italian Splatter film from the cult hero of late 70s - 80s low budget Italian gore, Fulci - who also brought us "The Beyond" and "City of The Living Dead". This flick is a favourite of mine because it's not your average haunted house story or your average zombie film! Also it was banned here in Britain for quite a long time and this is the first time I've managed to catch the full unedited version!

Not too a complicated plot, and with very little twists, turns or much in the way of story telling, this film isn't about the story, it's about the ride through slow motion gore soaked scenes and tense, if badly dubbed, creepy children scenes.

When a colleague of Dr. Norman Boyle (Paolo Malco) named Dr. Peterson is found dead in his large, old house in Boston in a cemetery, Boyle is asked to reside there for a short while to continue the man's research. He relocates from New York to the country house with his wife, Lucy (cult Italian gore actress, Catriona MacColl) and their young, floppy haired son, Bob (Giovanni Frezzi) - Yes, Bob.

Before setting off, Bob is anxious, and believes that a little girl in a photograph is warning him to stay away. But this is a horror film, so Bob's fears are dismissed instantly and the family move in. It isn't long, though, before they begin to regret their decision and Bob makes a new friend, Mae (Silvia Collatina).

I really enjoy this film. It's creepy in places, and although badly dubbed, and generally not the most exciting characters, the children in this film are damn creepy. There are hefty amounts of gore done with good old fashioned special effects, make up and props! Excellent!

Fulci loved his slow motion gore. It's like he wanted to make the audience slowly suffer through the death of the character as much as the character does! That, or he just really loved blood splatters in slow motion! There are quite a lot of violent and inventive deaths in this film.

They also reveal the 'creature'. While this can often be a mistake in film, this film carries it off spectacularly, creating a grotesque and nightmarish villain of the piece. They also don't reveal too much too early, however, and while the plot is not exactly complex or even very clever, the slow, nail biting chase scenes are effective because you don't quite know what's going on.

A real cult favourite with famous fans including Wednesday 13, this film is an excellent example of early 80s low budget Italian Splatters. Filmed entirely in English primarily by non-native speakers, it has an oddly dreamlike hue to it, a quality which creates a good playing field for the gore.

Another level of creep is added by an odd sub-story running in the background with a childish friendship, and the history of the house. Although not fully explored, and kind of clumsily done, some of these scenes are the most interesting non-gory scenes in the film.

Fulci has been condemned in the past for being misogynistic, and while his female characters are generally nothing but screaming gore fodder, he's not exactly alone in the genre in this, and I don't tend to dwell much on it. Many horror ladies spend most of their scream...sorry, screen time panicking and getting hacked up - a trend which is rapidly changing in the genre, but will always be there.

A good, gory 'what lurks in the basement?' kind of film.

 

[Image: Fulvia Film]

Hani

The Grim Reaper aka Anthropophagus

"The Grim Reaper" aka "Anthropophagus" aka "Zombie 7: Grim Reaper" (1980, Joe D'Amato, Shriekshow Entertainment, Hollywood DVD, Edward L. Montoro) is a low budget video nasty. This is the edited, edited, barely gory version. If you can get your hands on the full version well done! Keep it! It could be worth some money as it's damn near non-existent, and is highly collectible for fans of the genre.

You know when a movie goes by so many different titles it's either a good 'un or a 'dear god, what the hell did I just watch?' one. Well, this one's both!

The highly prudish British government in the 80s banned this film for its vulgarity. Which is why this edited version exists. And sadly, it does little justice to the full and freaky version!

And now we have "The Human Centipede" and "Saw" movies, which make this little Italian gorefest look like a kiddies cartoon! But ho hum, sick breeds sick, they say, and maybe it's little gems of terrible horror like this that are the reason such dire atrocities are even in existence (can you tell I think both of the aforementioned movies are complete bollocks? No?! Well, they're complete bollocks!). The scene which caused so much havoc in the UK, where the killer eats a foetus, has been edited out of this version.

The opening of this movie gets the obligatory semi-nudity out of the way; a couple get to a cast-over and cloudy beach, strip and the girl cavorts around in the water while the guy listens to some terrible 80s music with his fairly old and uninterested dog. The excitement begins when the dog begins 'barking' and (wait for it!) stands up and wanders about two feet before sitting back down again! This signifies that he knows something's amiss!

The horror begins, and the underwater filming is fairly impressive given the meagre budget this movie evidently had! Boyfriend takes his sweet time noticing his girl's in trouble, too. What an oaf!

We then start on our actual plot. Some young tourists are travelling around the Greek islands when they are asked by another young woman if she can tag a lift on their boat to one of the islands where she has some friends waiting and a job set up looking after a young English girl.

They happily oblige in their naive 80s way.

When they get to the island it's almost deserted! And to their dismay, they find a very dead body. They also find one survivor, the English girl that the older girl was coming to look after. And, just for fun, the English girl is blind and so can only tell them that 'the man' who killed everyone on the island is very scary and smells of blood.

When the group's pregnant friend goes missing, you'd think they'd look for her, but presuming she's on the, now sailing out to sea, boat they arrived on they turn in for the night! Great friends.

But when the 'man' arrives to take more victims, it soon turns into a quest for survival.

The props in this movie are hilarious! I especially enjoyed the oh-so-the-opposite-of-convincing severed head in the bucket! But some of the more impressive effects are done with some skinned animals, which are, of course, of questionable morality nowadays, but are damned gruesome.

A fun little jump and slash with some random back story and side characters. Even with the gore halved, it's not too boring, but it is a little slow to get started. It's just a bit wooden, terribly dated and kind of nuts!

The dubbing is kind of distracting, personally I'm a bigger fan of subtitles, but you get used to it.

Despite the wooden acting, the even more wooden voice acting of whoever dubbed over the film, and some props that looked more amateur than some of my own attempts, the film manages to be entertaining even in its heavily censored form. I'm glad I got it for 50p, though!

There are some normal horror hooks to watch for; tarot cards, ominous statements "no future", heavy breathing killer, blind, orphaned girl, pregnant lady and cleavers to name a few!

This film was the first horror film that wasn't pornography by the director D'Amato, and a year after this film was made he decided to remake it as a porno under a different title (stick to what you know, eh?).

He also make a kind-of sequel to the non-porn version called "Absurd". So there you go! Everything you ever needed to know about this crazy flick. Probably.

[Picture: Shriekshow Entertainment]

Hani