V/H/S/94

 "V/H/S/94" (2021, Jennifer Reeder, Chloe Okuno, Simon Barrett, Timo Tjahjanto, Ryan Prows, Steven Kostanski, Radio Silence Productions, Bloody Disgusting Films, Shudder Original Films) is a found footage horror anthology and the fourth installment in the V/H/S franchise. 

It's 1994 and a SWAT team enter an abandoned building and discover a series of VHS cassettes which we then watch in order. 

"Storm Drain" is an entertaining story of a reporter (Anna Hopkins) and cameraman (Christian Potenza) who are investigating the sighting of local urban legend "Ratman" and enter the storm sewers to uncover the truth. Upon finding a group of people living in there, they decide it's an opportunity to do a more serious human interest story but, unfortunately for them, the local legend may be more real than they thought! 

A pretty good segment with good pacing and some fun effects. 

"The Empty Wake" is by far my favourite segment of the film. Hayley (Kyal Legend) is a young woman working at a funeral home. She's been asked to hold the wake of a man named Andrew alone at night. After a while with no visitors, she begins to try and find out more about the death of Andrew when suddenly she hears what sounds like knocking coming from the coffin...

A pretty decent jump-fest. The segment builds up slowly before unleashing the actual scares, but, once there it's pretty fast paced. Some fun effects and, even if you feel like you knew where it was going, it's a really strong execution. 

"The Subject" is a story of a mad scientist (Budi Ross) engaging in human-machine vivisection and a team of army personnel on his trail to try and rescue some of his unwilling test subjects. 

We see most of the story in first-person style through the 'eyes' of one of his creations (Shania). The segment boasts some creative camera-work and pretty impressive 'off-screen' acting from our determined 'creature'. However, the action is pretty videogame-like and did feel like it overstayed its welcome a little (and I say this as someone who likes playing videogames). But the action is truly gory and pretty satisfying to watch.

"Terror" is about a group of insurrectionists in America who are planning to attack a federal building. This segment was the weakest in my opinion and didn't hold my interest extremely well. The humour felt somewhat misplaced in comparison to the other segments, although it maintained the same level of gore. 

The wraparound "Holy Hell" is functional but not a standout part of the film, although I did enjoy the 90s advert for "The Veggie Masher". Very entertaining. 

All in all, this is the first time I've really enjoyed a V/H/S installment since the original film, and it felt pretty innovative. The pacing is still an issue, but this is part and parcel with horror anthologies as a whole. 

Available to stream on Shudder.

[Image: Shudder, et al]

Hani

Patchwork

"Patchwork" (2015, Tyler MacIntyre, Infinite Lives Entertainment) is a horror comedy inspired by various Frankenstein tropes.

A self proclaimed mad scientist (Corey Sorenson) reanimates a corpse made of three different women:
- snooty business woman, Jennfer (Tory Stopler),
- bimbo with a heart of gold, Ellie (Tracey Fairaway), and;
- shy-but-unstable, Madeline (Maria Blasucci).

The woman-women then go on a rampage while they try to work out what's happened to them and how to cope with their new normal... and also to hook up with a guy called Garret (James Phelps) who tries to help them out.

A fun and imaginative take on the popular Mary Shelley-esque tale. Well made and engaging, the film keeps you smiling as you go and doesn't outstay its welcome at 1.5hrs.

Lots of visual gags and a couple of thoughtful moments amongst the mayhem as well as the memorable line "my favourite colour is sparkly".

[Image: Infinite Lives Entertainment]

Hani

The Tingler

"The Tingler" (1959, William Castle, Columbia Pictures, William Castle Productions).

Dr. Warren Chapin (Vincent Price) discovers that the phenomenon where the spine tingles in fear is actually due to the presence of a fear feasting, parasitic creature which he names The Tingler. The creature can kill its host, but is weakened by a human scream.

Desperate to prove his discovery, he performs an autopsy on a deaf, non-verbal woman who had died of fright, removing the creature! But can he keep such a specimen under control?

One of the Castle films which benefited from his love of gimmicks including the Percepto vibrating cinema seat; a precursor to gimmicks still in use today.

The film is a fabulous schlock classic and the plot moves along well even today under the committed and masterful performance of Vincent Price and some fun effects. The scene where Mrs Higgins (Judith Evelyn) dies of fright is excellent and Castle used striking targeted colour in an otherwise black and white film to bring out the red of the blood.

The Tingler creature itself remains an entertaining effect. The story isn't the most absurd in our wonderful genre by far, but is admittedly weird. Despite that, however, The Tingler is an excellent piece of cinema and definitely a must-see for any classic horror fan.

[Image: Columbia Pictures]

Hani

Blood Monkey

"Blood Monkey" (2007, Robert Young, Thai Occidental Production, RHI Entertainment, Genius Entertainment) is a nature-bites-back adventure horror set in Thailand.

A group of student anthropologists travel to the jungle to assist Professor Conrad Hamilton (F. Murray Abraham) in his quest to capture a creature he believes to be the missing link in human evolution. Only, when the students arrive they discover that the initial research team are no longer there and the Professor and his somewhat sadistic assistant, Chenne (Prapimporn Karnchanda), are less than professional. Can they escape the jungle before the massive, bloodthirsty trophy specimen can brutally murder them all?

I will admit I watched this film for two reasons:

1. It is a B-movie with a pun title
2. I have a crush on Matt Ryan

I stayed for two reasons:

1. Matt Ryan
2. Matt Ryan using his own accent

Ok, a third reason: F. Murray Abraham hamming it up big style! If the scenery hadn't been potentially poisonous, he would have been chomping on it. 

This is a straight-to-DVD syfy movie so it plays out in a very by-the-numbers style: too much dialogue, not enough 'monster'. But it does have some entertaining effects when we finally do see some of our 'monkeys' and there was an abseiling scene which must have been sketchy to film...

It doesn't outstay its welcome at 90 minutes and delivers the anticipated levels of cheese, but it could have been doing with a little bit more monkey for our money. It's definitely a cautionary tale about outlandish uni trips with maniacal professors.

[Image: RHI Entertainment]

Hani

Shock Waves

"Shock Waves" aka "Almost Human" aka "Death Corps" (1977, Ken Wiederhorn, Zopix Company) is a shipwreck-cum-Nazi-zombie-survival movie.


Captain Ben Morris (John Carradine), his crew and his passengers are involved in an accident when travelling across sea. They are forced to abandon their wrecked boat and the survivors find their way onto an nearby island.


They are shocked to learn that the island is not completely uninhabited when they meet a reclusive SS Commander (Peter Cushing) who warns them to leave the island as it is dangerous.


Unable to heed his warning, due mostly to the fact that they lack any means of escape, the survivors find that they are being hunted by a swarm of undead Nazi super-soldiers created during WWII. The Commander had purposefully sunk his ship containing them, trapping himself on the island in the process. But, being zombies, the creatures have been lying dormant in wait of fresh victims...


A slow moving film that lacks the strong plot necessary to keep up momentum, but managing to be entertaining in its sheer silliness and feature a very cool setting. The zombies seem to be mostly aquatic and we are treated to many scenes of them slowly rising from the shallows to trap their victims, walking underwater and jumping into unused swimming pools. They are also decked out in Nazi uniforms and wearing dark goggles which protect them from the dangers of daylight.


I would have enjoyed a little more of both John Carradine and Peter Cushing in this film, but despite their relatively short screentime the film is still engaging thanks to our cast of hapless, squabbling tourists and final girl, Rose (Brooke Adams).


A slow film that does not deliver much in the way of gore or scares; most of the action is off-screen. However, the film is well made, enjoys some good underwater scenes and is nonetheless a good yarn worth checking out. Even if it's mostly just for the begoggled zombies.

[Image: Zopix Co.]

Hani

Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

"Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid" (2004, Dwight H. Little, Columbia TriStar) is the disconnected sequel to Anaconda.

A group of scientific researchers journey to Borneo, Indonesia to hunt for the rare Blood Orchid which they believe has important medical properties which could extend human lives. They pay a guide to take them up river in their search, despite severe weather and flood warnings. And snakes. Lots of man eating snakes.

An adventure horror sequel which plays out pretty much as you expect it to. B-movie script, B-movie action, CGI that looks a bit clunky, some back stabbing, an obvious twist and the star of the show; Captain Bill's monkey friend.

A good bit of fun of notably lesser quality than the original film, and with more numerous, but less menacing, snakes.

[Image: Columbia Tri-Star]

Hani

Monkey Shines

"Monkey Shines" aka "Monkey Shines: An Experiment in Fear" (1988, George A. Romero, Orion Pictures) is a film about a killer Capuchin monkey and one man's life changing.


Allan (Jason Beghe) is an active man with a seemingly idyllic lifestyle. Alas, things change for Allan when he is involved in an accident, rendering him quadriplegic. With his life forever altered, his girlfriend leaving him for his Neurosurgeon, John Wiseman (Stanley Tucci), and his meddling mother (Joyce Van Patten) and rough nurse (Christine Forrest) on the scene controlling his every move, Allan is beginning to feel that death would be a simpler solution.


In a morally questionable attempt to help out his buddy and also protect his human brain tissue/monkey injection research from his sneaky boss, Geoffrey (John Pankow), a scientist friend of Allan's, decides to have his best monkey specimen, Six (Boo) trained by Melanie (Kate McNeill); a specialist in quadriplegia and a trainer of helper monkeys for the disabled. Melanie renames Six Ella and trains her up.


Soon Allan is finding a new lease on life again with both his helpful little monkey pal and with Melanie. Unbeknownst to them both, however, Geoffrey is still injecting Ella with his serum in an attempt to increase her intellect to human levels. As time progresses and Allan's bond with Ella increases, it becomes apparent that things are getting creepy. Especially when things and people that upset Allan suddenly wind up dead at very small, somewhat hairy hands...


A fun but clunky piece that does not feel like any other Romero movie. However, being his first studio film, this may be the main reason why and the odd outcome seemed to disenchant Romero with studio films completely as he soon returned to independent films which gave him more creative freedom. The monkey is adorable, there's one or two jumps and the film approaches themes of romance with a disabled character with a fair amount of class and a fairly x-rated scene. Overall it is a  fairly enjoyable film, however, it suffers from pacing, a lot of studio changes that make it feel unstructured and a decidedly odd feeling ending.

[Image: Orion Pictures]

Hani



Dead Heat

"Dead Heat" (1988, Mark Goldblatt, New World Pictures) is a horror comedy.

Detectives Roger Mortis (Treat Williams) and Doug Bigelow (Joe Piscopo) are investigating an unusual robbery at a jewellery store where two of the robbers, having been killed by police, are found to be people who had already had autopsies completed on them previously... by the same police morgue coroner.

Following the chemical clues from the bodies, the Detectives find themselves involved in a science fiction plot where one of them will become the living dead! In a race against time to decomposition, the team must try to take down the evil corporation bringing the dead back to life.

A fun, daft film which doesn't try to be more than what it is and enjoys a lot of pseudoscience, cheesy fight scenes (including the oddest fight scene involving freshly butchered animal carcasses ever) and a small cameo from Vincent Price.

[Image: New World Pictures]

Hani

Nightmare Castle

"Nightmare Castle" (1965, Mario Caiano, Cinematografica Emmeci) is a fun black and white Italian horror riddled with well trodden tropes and perfect for scratching a gothic horror itch. It's maybe not the best Italian horror of the time, but it's certainly worth viewing and will appeal to many fans of the genre.

Dr. Stephen Arrowsmith (Paul Meuller) is a mad scientist living in the grand ancestral castle home of his gorgeous and gothic wife, Muriel (Barbara Steele). Muriel, however, is having a steamy affair with their gardener, David. Upon catching the pair mid-embrace in the greenhouse, Stephen flies into a rage and beats the gardener before chaining both of them up and torturing them to death.

Using mad science (it's very different from normal science), Stephen then uses the blood of his victims to give his elderly servant, Solange, youth, turning her into the beautiful Helga Liné. Stephen and Solange then begin a relationship of their own, while the souls of Muriel and David are trapped in the castle by the their disembodied hearts skewered within an urn in the main hall.

To his dismay, however, Stephen learns that he was not Muriel's heir and that the castle has passed to her stepsister Jenny (also Barbara Steele) who currently resides in a mental institution. Seeing an opportunity, Stephen quickly marries the poor girl and drags her to the castle to live with him and Solange while he continues both his experiments and the affair with Solange.

Jenny begins to feel terrified, claiming to hear the spirits in the castle and beginning to take on the characteristics of her dear departed half sister. Finding Jenny's behaviour uncomfortable, and keen to declare her insane (but still married) so he can have his cake and eat it, Stephen calls for Jenny's doctor, Dr. Derek Joyce (Marino Masé) to the castle to treat her. However, the Dr. begins to suspect that there are supernatural forces at work and accidentally releases the vengeful spirits of the dead lovers to wreak havoc on those who wronged them!

Critics of the time considered this film to be too tropey. They threw around words like 'pedestrian' and 'obvious'. And while I can appreciate that the film certainly contains a lot of characteristics prevalent in many horrors from that period, it does so with a charm and clarity that many other films were devoid of. The drama between the characters is well achieved, and the strange and mostly undeveloped sub-plot of rejuvenating youth aside, the plot moves on at a good pace.

Barbara Steele gives us two very distinct characters with the sultry vixen Muriel being the antithesis of her nervous and pure stepsister, Jenny. We are also treated to a period clothing undressing scene that would put many a modern burlesque performer to shame.

The film also boasts some practical effects that still stand well to the modern viewer and a convincing entrance for our ghostly characters upon their release from the urn. While it's unlikely to have you shaking in your boots, it certainly has an ethereal and atmospheric charm that is exactly what I'm looking for in a gothic horror.

If you're looking for a Halloween warm-up film available to stream on Amazon you could do a lot worse than a visit to this drama-filled stately home set in Rome.

[Image: Cinematografica Emmeci]

Hani

Anatomie 2

"Anatomie 2" (2003, Stefan Ruzowitzky, Strand Releasing) is a sequel to, you guessed it, "Anatomie". It's a German language body horror set in a Berlin hospital.

A young neurosurgeon called Jo (Barnaby Metschurat) moves to Berlin to make his big break. Quickly he manages to catch the attention of Dr. Müller-LaRousse (Herbert Knaup). The doctor invites the young man to join his research group, where Jo becomes not only acquainted with other young, inquiring minds, but becomes completely immersed in their licentious research, and therefore equally culpable if their immoral practices are found out.

However, when a fellow group member, who was having an attack of conscience, is found murdered it becomes apparent that the good Dr. may not suffer any dissension in his ranks...

I have admittedly not seen the first movie, but would definitely search it out now that I've seen its sequel. This film was so much fun. It has a strong plot, a good amount of fairly gruesome effects and a good cast of interesting and unusual characters. The film explores the ethics of research and science and the hunger for knowledge.

Jo's character is not only driven by his desire for success, but also for the desire to help his brother who has Muscular Dystrophy, giving the character a more rounded motive. His fellow researchers are all also driven by their own personal motivations. Be it sexual pleasure, vanity or fame.

A really fun film and one of the best random DVD finds I've had recently!

[Image: Strand Releasing]

Hani

Daughter of Dr Jekyll

"Daughter of Dr Jekyll" (1957, Edgar G. Ulmer, Film Venturers, Allied Artists) is a low-budget, black and white horror.

Janet (Gloria Talbott) returns to her childhood home with her fiancé, George Hastings (John Agar), to celebrate her 21st birthday and to inform her friend and father figure, Dr. Lomas (Arthur Shields), of she and George's engagement. Upon returning, Janet learns that she is actually the daughter of the infamous Dr. Jekyll and she becomes concerned that she may also suffer from her father's monstrous affliction. However, all may not be as it seems!

A slow moving film which takes it's time to get to the point, but once there is quite entertaining. The setting is a big mansion in the woods surrounded by a small town of superstitious people who are quick to start an angry mob; it feels like most other horror films from the era. And although the scripting is a little clunky in places and the fight and transformation scenes do not compare to other, larger budget films of the era, I did enjoy the overall plot-line.

A film about a young girl's struggle for identity, masquerading as a cheesy monster movie. It's the kind of late night cheese-fest that hits the spot on a dark and stormy night.

[Image: Allied Artists]

Hani

Flatliners

"Flatliners" (1990, Joel Schumacher, Columbia Pictures, Stonebridge Entertainment) is a sci-fi horror about the dangers of fooling around with the afterlife.

Medical student, Nelson (Kiefer Sutherland), has a theory he wants to prove: he wants to die and then brought back under controlled conditions to prove that there is something beyond death. He convinces fellow students; Rachel (Julia Roberts), Dave (Kevin Bacon), Joe (William Baldwin) and Randy (Oliver Platt) to help him achieve this experiment. When the experiment turns out to be successful, each of Nelson's associates are keen to have their own turn to see beyond the veil. However, Nelson has withheld some disturbing information about the aftereffects of his discovery: he did not come back from the netherworld alone...

A really excellent film that enjoys an amazing cast and a really striking style which has been mimicked by many films since. Abstract, inventive and entertaining this film enjoys a deserved cult status and it's cast went on to achieve great things in their own right. The only negative plot point would be the repetitiveness of the story. We do eventually go through the motions after the first couple of characters flatline.

A fun bit of sci-fi that has aged well.

[Image: Stonebridge Entertainment]

Hani

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1977)

"The Island of Dr. Moreau" (1977, Don Taylor, American International Pictures) is one of the film adaptations of H.G. Wells' famous novel.

Andrew Braddock (Michael York) survives a shipwreck and eventually lands on an unknown island after 17 days at sea. He finds himself the welcomed guest of honour at the island's leader's house, that of Dr. Moreau (Burt Lancaster); a mysterious and unusual scientist who has been living on the island for some time.

Moreau is joined by a mercenary called Montgomery (Nigel Davenport) who serves Moreau as his associate, but does not like the man, and a beautiful young woman called Maria (Barbara Carrera). There are natives on the island, too, who are very odd-looking, they almost do not look like men at all. Moreau's personal servant is one such native called M'Ling (Nick Cravat).

Braddock becomes intrigued by Moreau's experiments and learns, to his horror, that the 'natives' are not in fact human at all, but man-beasts: the results of Moreau's twisted experiments to make humans from wild animals....

Although key aspects of the story were changed for the screen, and Moreau's experiments lose some of their shocking awfulness by being entirely serum based, instead of part vivisection, the film still packs a cold, dreadful punch.

Michael York is always so upstanding and polite. His portrayal of Braddock is good, however, and his anguish is quite disturbing. Lancaster portrays an excellent Moreau. His menacing intellect and his obsessive control over the island are unsettling. The makeup and effects are really impressive, but then, John Chambers was the makeup designer (Planet of the Apes, Star Trek, and other such impressive credits) so it could not be anything but.

It's a relatively tame flick, considering the subject matter, but this is in most part due to the era in which it was made. But it is still an enjoyable film with some solid performances, but not as much mystery as I would like.

[Image: American International Pictures]

Hani

From Beyond

"From Beyond" (1986, Stuart Gordon, Empire Pictures) is a cult, sci-fi, body horror film based loosely on a short story by H.P. Lovecraft.

Dr. Pretorius (Ted Sorel) is a genius scientist with unusual fetishes who has developed a machine which allows people to see outside of the known reality by stimulating the sixth sense. Unfortunately, the machine's effects are addictive and, despite discovering that the other realm can access ours using the machine, Pretorius cannot allow himself to stop. His assistant, Dr. Tillinghast (Jeffrey Combs), is bitten by a creature from the other side and tries to stop the experiment, seeing it's destructive nature, but a larger creature comes through the void and kills Dr. Pretorius.

Dr. Tillinghast is locked up in an ward for the criminally insane, suspected of Pretorius' murder and no one will believe his outlandish story. No one, that is, until he meets determined blonde, Dr. McMichaels (Barbara Crampton) who, with her associate, Detective Bubba Brownlee (Ken Foree), take Tillinghast back to the house to repeat the experiment and prove his innocence and sanity.

A funny cult film which enjoys close links to "Re-Animator" in casting, direction, behind the scenes team and special effects. While dated, it still stands as a fun, gross B-movie and captures the Lovecraft vibe. There's some funny patter between characters ridiculous dominatrix outfits, questionable science, floating eel creatures, humorous decapitations.... there's a lot going on in this film.

I like a bit of dated special effects and I have to appreciate the Lovecraftian creativity of this film's effects: they are both very fun and very squidgy. Definitely my kind of film. "From Beyond" is also really watchable and has an easy to follow plot that doesn't veer too off story like some other B-movies. It's silly, humorous and ludicrous in equal measures. Sheer campy horror frolics not to be taken seriously.

[Image: Empire Pictures]

Hani

Frankenstein (2015)

"Frankenstein" aka "Frank3nst3in" (2015, Bernard Rose, Bad Badger, Summerstorm Entertainment, Eclectic Pictures) is a modernised retelling of the classic novel by Mary Shelley.

Set in the present day in LA, a couple of mad scientist lovers (Carrie-Anne Moss and Danny Huston) and their pal 3D Print a fully grown man (Xavier Samuel) in their home lab. They initially celebrate their successes and attempt to nurture the creature (known, of course, as Adam) in a somewhat disturbing few scenes of nursing and screaming. But soon they realise that they have made an error in their calculations and their beautiful creation is becoming both inhumanly strong and grotesquely disfigured as his cells begin to degenerate.

The creature escapes into the world where he is unaccepted and severely mistreated by strangers, forced to scrounge for food, living homeless and without any understanding of the world. He makes a friend in a kind and wise, blind homeless man (Tony Todd) who teaches him to speak and helps him survive the city streets. However, his monstrous appearance and strength get the better of him frequently as he tries to get back to his creators.

This film boasts some recognisable faces, a poignant update on the classic monster tale and manages to make the humans the true villains of the piece (just like the original), but suffers from a low-ish budget and somewhat boring, meandering scenes. The narration is also somewhat confusing, giving us the impression that the monster has a differing future, and gains full conversational skills. I'm sure it's meant to be his internal monologue which would be how he'd like to sound, but for me it made the ending seem confusing, abrupt and a little disappointing.

This film is a straight to DVD release.

[Image: Bad Badger, et al]

Hani

Victor Frankenstein

"Victor Frankenstein " (2015, Paul McGuigan, Davis Entertainment Company, TSG Entertainment, 20th Century Fox) is a retelling of Mary Shelley's famous novel.

We meet the currently nameless hunchback destined to become the iconic assistant, Igor (Daniel Radcliffe), working as a clown and aspiring physician at a circus, where he is brutalised and beaten often by his 'circus family'. He is saved by Victor Frankenstein (James McAvoy) who sees the young man's astounding intellect and potential when Igor's dream girl, the beautiful acrobat, Lorelei (Jessica Brown Findlay), is hurt during a performance and tended to by Igor.

Upon being freed from the circus, Igor is taken to Frankenstein's impressive home where the trainee Dr. quickly corrects Igor's deformity and posture, which was not a true hunchback condition and shows him his impressive scientific experiments. Together they assemble a creature which they bring to life to impress Victor's peers and superiors at university. The experiment succeeds but, instead of being met with applause, Victor is dismayed to find that his creature has brought him only disgust and it soon becomes violent, forcing him to kill it.

Not disheartened by this, Victor and Igor continue to work on a bigger, better creature whilst dodging the attentions of a determined Scotland Yard inspector who suspects the pair of murder and worse.

Although the horror elements are remarkably tame, the film attempts to retell the tale through Igor's eyes in an imaginative fashion and updates the plot without losing too much of the original tale.

McAvoy and Radcliffe make an excellent pair of mad scientists with McAvoy playing the titular Victor Frankenstein in true charismatic, maniacal brilliance. Radcliffe brings a new dimension to the usually humorous assistant character of Igor, with a confused ethical code, heroic qualities and a sympathetic charm.

It was nice to see Igor get a new lease on life (and some intellectual credit) and to see the tale from a different perspective. However, the film itself does nothing particularly ground breaking and certainly won't appease the gore hounds. It stands as a fun retelling but can be boring in places and, despite the excellent performances of the main characters, it does not break free from other Frankenstein remakes as anything unique.

[Image: 20th Century Fox, et al]

Hani

Beyond Re-Animator

"Beyond Re-Animator" (2003, Filmax International, Lionsgate Entertainment, Castelao Producciones, Fantastic Factory, Brian Yuzna) is the third Re-Animator film.

We find Dr. Herbert West (Jeffrey Combs) in prison using meagre scraps in order to continue his experiments on rats. A young new doctor, Howard Phillips (Jason Barry), joins as prison MD and reveals himself as interested in West's research for personal reasons. His personal reasons get a load more personal, however, when the pretty young journalist he's dating, Laura (Elsa Pataky), is killed and reanimated.

West's rat experiments have opened the door to him to allow him to control his reanimated creations further, but the results can be messy when he is reunited with his neon green concoction....

Soon the prison is overrun with violent reanimated zombies and under the control of the psychotic reanimated Warden (Simón Andreu). Oh, and there's also a vicious zombie rat cutting about with a severed human zombie penis....

Yes, this is a OTT, hilarious, gore-soaked splatter romp, just as its predecessors were. No complaints here. It's brilliant. Not a cerebral film, but wonderfully silly. Combs brings back West in all his glory.

 

 

[Image: Castelao Producciones]

Hani

Black Sheep

"Black Sheep" (2006, Jonathan King, The New Zealand Film Commission, Icon Productions) is a horror comedy about killer-zombie-were-sheep.

Henry (Nathan Meister) has a sheep phobia. Which is a shame because he comes from a long line of sheep farmers. He's returned home to the farm to arrange land ownership with his sheep farming brother, Angus (Peter Feeney). Unbeknownst to Henry, Angus has been doing some mad science as well as sheep farming and has created some Jekyll and Hyde style potion which turns sheep into carniverous killers who's bite turn humans into deformed, blood thirsty, man-sheep hybrids. Henry must face his phobia and help fight to restore normality.

A fairly creative concept with a lot of gore and some fun puppetry. Sadly, I just didn't find the farce funny and the script didn't really merit a feature-length film.

The characters were annoying. I get the whole idea that the tree-huggers were meant to be annoying, but really the half-assed hippy banter got irritating after the first half.

The pacing was also not great, and there wasn't enough humour to keep it going.

Not funny, not clever, not engaging. I really don't understand all the online rave reviews out there!

[Image: The New Zealand Film Commission]

Hani

Frankenstein (1931)

"Frankenstein" (1931, Universal Pictures, James Whale, Carl Laemmle, Jr.) is the iconic classic starring Boris Karloff in his most famous (and career making) role.

Based on the story by Mary Shelley, Dr. Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) and his hunchbacked assistant, Fritz (Dwight Frye) build a man from the body parts of corpses and bring it to life using Galvanisation with electricity. The poor creature, who is not the villain of the piece really, goes on a rampage and incurs the wrath of the townspeople.

Henry's fiancé, Elizabeth (Mae Clarke), his best friend Victor (John Boles) and his old teacher, Dr. Waldman (Edward Van Sloan) attempt to help make things right before the monster goes too far.

A truly awe-inspiring piece, the famous appearance of the monster character is still striking to this day. The film itself is fun as well as pretty, with some really humorous scenes involving Henry's father, Baron Frankenstein (Frederick Kerr), and a plot which moves forward. The full film is only 71 minutes long but manages to fit a lot of lovely creepy scenes, German folk dancing and an angry mob vs monster battle in there!

Despite not being a gory film, it remains a steadfast piece of cinema history and a thrilling and atmospheric horror. Seeing it in the cinema today was a real experience!

 

 

[Image: Universal Pictures]

 

Hani

Munsters' Revenge

"The Munsters' Revenge" (1981, Universal Studios) is the made-for-TV film with original cast members Herman (Fred Gwynne), Lily (Yvonne De Carlo) and Grandpa (Al Lewis) Munster.

The Munster family have been immortalised as waxworks in a local museum. Unfortunately, these wax models are actually evil robots who wreak havoc all over town, resulting in Herman and Grandpa being blamed for the crimes and thrown in prison!

Can they clear their names before the big Munster Halloween party?

A fun little film which doesn't deviate from the characters, humour or styling of the original show and kept me suitably entertained on a long train ride.

[Image: Universal Studios]

Hani